Not even mad.

Pose : Imitation - Ally 6 B

Background : MINIMAL - Illusion II - *7* (Gacha)

I think we've all been in a position where we've heard a story about a person, stored the story in the back of our head having made a snap decision and then got to know the person in question, thus realizing the story was correct, or in fact very very false.

I can be super judgmental, and I'm the first to admit this. However, I will give someone the benefit of the doubt. Second chances are handed out like candycanes for me, depending on the length of time that has passed (I see it as scope for growth), or the severity of the first 'mistake'.

I do get it wrong, sometimes. I am human. There are times I have let the same people make the same fool of me over and over, to the point I know those I care about want to shake me, or I'll go the other way and cut someone off who really doesn't deserve it, purely because it's easier for me to leave them first, or because they're engaging with other people that I consider to be difficult.

Sometimes, the stories you're hearing aren't being told for you to formulate an opinion on, but for the teller to arrange facts in their own head. I know when I 'bitch' or 'vent' I'm doing it not because I actually think that-person-I-don't-know is an idiot, but because I need to make sense of the situation.

Most of the things I say aloud to friends, I will also say out loud to the person my rant pertains to.

Anyway. I guess I'm rambling because I heard a bad thing about a person who I consider to be good.

I questioned them.

Their response enabled me to figure out "my" side of their truth.

Maybe you'll afford someone the same opportunity one day.

Perhaps their truth will be something you can handle, or maybe you'll simply move on alone.

All of the things :

Body & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : LAQ Bento - Motion Capture - Scarlet 

Skin : -Glam Affair - Lola Applier - LAQ Head @ Kustom9

Eyes : LOTUS. Brilliant Eyes @ Pocket Gacha 

Bindi & Nose Ring : :: SAGA :: Wonderland Jewel Set @ Kustom9

Hair : #Foxy - Whip Hair (Formerly @ N21)

Tattoo : *Bolson / Willem @ TMD

Sweater & Bra : BUENO-Half Hoodie -Mat-Bye Torn @ Kustom9

Pants :  .:villena:. - Track Pants @ District 20

Sneakers : *Tentacio* Winter Bunny. bunny sneakers (Gacha) @ Kustom9

Coming through.

Pose & Dogs : .Focus Poses. Couple 27

Location : D 0 X

I can't describe the feeling of contentment I have right now.

To say the last week has been a rollercoaster of emotions would be an understatement, even by my standards. If you've been reading for a while, you'll know that I barely left my platform for two years. It seems that stepping out of my box has ruffled a few feathers, and I'm okay with that. Those who know me, will continue to. Those that don't perhaps never will.

This last week I literally bumped souls with someone. At first, I was naturally cautious.

The more we talked and the more patient they were, the easier it has been for me to open up.

I'm not scared to say anything.

I'm not worried that I might be too much, or not enough.

As things stand right now, holding hands and walking is enough, and I cannot thank them enough for their understanding of me, their time spent with me allowing me the space for creativity and ranting and all the things that make me feel good.

I'm  not stifled. I'm still free.

And it feels really, really fucking nice.

All of the things, SantiClaus :

Body & Hands : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body 

Skin : Tableau Vivant \\ Fabio applier 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Daniel

Eyes : -SU!- Lythion Eyes

Hairbase : Stealthic - Male Hairbase

Hair :  Modulus - Julius Hair (FREE Fatpack @ Consent)

Coat/Hoody/Shirt :  fame femme: Pit Coat @ TMD

Jeans :  Legal Insanity - Lynch black jeans w/bandana

Boots : [Deadwool] Patmos boots

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : LAQ Bento - Motion Capture - Scarlet 

Skin : Insol: face Vera, ST03 'Peach' 

Birthmark : [okkbye] dewy blushers (catwa & omega)

Eyes :  -SU!-Delora Eyes Fatpack /ULTRARARE/ (Gacha) 

Bindi & Nose Ring : :: SAGA :: Wonderland Jewel Set @ Kustom9

Hair : *barberyumyum*93 

Coat : NIU - Cotton coat @ Liaison Collaborative

Sheep Bag :  =Zenith= Sheep Head Bag (Note : This is a really old gacha item, not sure if still available)

Leggings : Blueberry - Cake - Tight Leggings 

Boots & Socks : #EMPIRE - Luculia @ Winter Trend

Move in closer.

Pose & Held Gifts : *!R.O!* 'Tis the Season

Props : Gifts on table : {moss&mink}  All that Glitters - Gift Pile (classic) @ The Arcade

Table : {anc} NOEL. :  feather table (Gacha)

Rug :  {anc}  NOEL. :  frilled furrug  (Gacha)

Stool :  {anc} NOEL. :  hoofs ladder chair (Gacha)

Candles : {moss&mink}  All that Glitters - Candle Red @ The Arcade

Frame : BALACLAVA!! Milton Gold Frame

Fireplace : ChiMia:: Ephemeral Fireplace 

Tree :  {anc} NOEL. :  tears tree / 9Li RARE (Gacha)

Pup, Sled & Reindeer : O.M.E.N -Christmas Morning @ Tannenbaum 

"Don't get your tinsel in a tangle!"

I understand that this season means different things depending on your religion and culture, and I'm okay with wishing people "Happy Holidays" or "Seasons Greetings" if it means they feel included, because ultimately, that's what this season is all about.

I also think it has a lot to do with being kind, giving not receiving and if you do receive, receive gracefully and gratefully.

I don't think it takes much to be a pleasant human. Maybe a little more effort, and though I'll be first to admit I've made bunches of mistakes in the past, I'm going forward with the notion that it's worth the effort. We just need to know when to draw the line, which for me is a constant work in progress. 

Please take this as an opportunity to love each other, to pass on the spirit of joy and happiness to those around you. Winter can be a tough season to get through, and sometimes it's easy to fall into a grumpiness or a depression, so remember that when you're talking to people. There's so many reasons to be sad, or melancholy. Be the reason for someone to smile today.

All of the things, SantiClaus : 

Body & Hands : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body 

Skin : Tableau Vivant \\ Fabio applier 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Daniel

Eyes : -SU!- Lythion Eyes

Hairbase : Stealthic - Male Hairbase

Hair :   Stealthic  - Like Lust

Ears : L'Etre - Ringed mesh ears

Tattoo : Isuka : Drifter

Undies :  Mossu - Kevin.Underwear

All of the things, Pickle : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Essences - Rachel 

Head : CATWA Catya

Eyes : CATWA Mesh Eyes 

Eyes :  LOTUS. Lovely Eyes @ The Chapter Four

Brows : Viena :: Perfect Eyebrows Grey @ Bodyfy 

Blush : Izzie's - Winter Blush (Former Gift)

Ears :  ^^Swallow^^  Pyramid Ears

Lipstick : [PF] CATWA LIPSTICK Applier - Glossy Pout

Hair :  #Foxy- Mondaze.

Antlers : Astralia - Funny holidays gacha (the holidays deer) RARE (Gacha)

Tattoo : DAPPA - Sasuke Tattoo. @ Man Cave

Panties : .:villena:. - Red Thong  (Group gift)

Lights : :Moon Amore: FALALALA Socks&Lights @ Collabor88

Socks : fame femme: Winter socks - Maitreya - RARE (Gacha) @ Liaison Collaborative

Drain my heart.

Pose : Lushish Poses - Spank me Daddy f (Note: This is NOT a bento pose. I used my ao, but you can find a bento hand pose hud on Marketplace, too!)

Props : Fireplace : LISP - Mesh - Artemis Fireplace

Cat : *HEXtraordinary* Nope Cat - Mistletoe Hat (Gacha)

Chair : dust bunny . my plaid chair

Side Table :  dust bunny . round end table

Cookies :  dust bunny . tree cookies

"The empty vessel makes the loudest sound."

It's pretty easy to find quotes to relate to any moment in your life, such is the beauty of the interwebs. I'm guessing even if my opinion was different, I would be able to find an appropriate quote to fulfill that, too.

I do love me some Shakespeare though!

This is a very brief write-up today because my spoon count is low, but just remember kids, unless you've walked in the same shoes, the same footprints as someone, you don't know them. 

And most of all, consider your sources.

♥

All of the things : 

Body & Feet : -Belleza- Freya 

Skin : Insol 'Peach' 

Lingerie & Pearls : *MC* Naughty & Nice Lingerie For Bound Box December

Hands : Slink Hands - Dynamic

Nails : Astralia - Compatible mesh nails system

Nail Polish : Hello Dave - Nail Appliers - Astralia - The French One

Butt Applier : W:6 Red Ass and boobs Xmas Special @ Bodyfy 

Tell me how you feel.

Pose : *CNZ* Kinky Santa 01 (Mirror) @ Ebento

Held Decorations : {moss&mink} Baubleicious! (Gacha) @ Tannenbaum

Christmas Tree : {moss&mink} All that Glitters - Christmas Tree (pastel) RARE (Gacha) @ The Arcade

Chair : {moss&mink} Daydream Chair @ District20

Rug : _CandyDoll_Fancy Rug Rose

"Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive."

Appearances can be deceptive.

I've learned that you really can't judge a book by it's cover. As much as I love to see a fully put together avatar, I'm far more open to finding a fully put together heart now. 

For me, outside appearances are now a bonus.

I would rather meet a new player with a pure heart than an old player with a twisted mind and some pretty pixels.

Trusting is no longer easy, for many of us. We have been burned. We have been mislabelled by reactions we've had to situations caused by the malice of others. We're pigeon holed by those labels and fight to free ourselves daily. While I believe we are many things to many people, the only person who ever has a chance of really understanding us, is ourselves. Unless, we open up.

I want nothing more than to continue being brave, opening up to people and allowing them in. Encountering all their pain, and molding it with mine in a bitter sweet reminiscence that brings us close. Not sheltering each other, but leaning against each other and saying "I understand." Because with most situations you have encountered, another would have been there too.

I'm incredibly grateful to the people I have met lately.

You have all taught me to be strong, and have unintentionally assured me that yes, there IS still good. Yes, there ARE still people who believe in the basic morality of humanity and consideration to others and their lives.

Live your way, but do it respectfully.

All of the things :

Body & Feet : -Belleza- Freya 

Head : LAQ Bento - Motion Capture - Scarlet 

Skin : Insol: face Vera, ST03 'Peach' 

Ears :  ^^Swallow^^ Rox Ears 

Birthmark : [okkbye] bold birthmarks

Eyes :  -SU!-Delora Eyes Fatpack /ULTRARARE/ (Gacha) 

Headpiece : *LODE* Head Accessory - Hibiscus [white] @ The Chapter Four

Hair : TRUTH HAIR Olympia

Glasses : .tsg. Shy Megane 

Nipple Chain : Messy. Gem Barbells Nipplechain 

Hands : Slink Hands - Dynamic

Nails : Astralia - Compatible mesh nails system

Nail Polish : Hello Dave - Nail Appliers - Astralia - The French One

Fishnets :Bossie. diamond fishnet tights 

Panties : Blueberry - Tinker Panties 

Shoes : #EMPIRE - Sundrop 

I choose to believe.

Pose : *!R.O!* Renew BENTO Pose (Note, this pose comes with a bird, I just swapped it out)

Robin : MishMish - Robins in the snow 

Location : Luane's World

Spoons.

Many of my friends know and understand the term and I feel like it should be a universal term for, well, everyone.

The original article is >here< and it's written in relation to Lupus. However, I feel like it should be noted that no matter who you are, you have a limited amount of spoons, daily.

The basic gist of the article is that you need a physical representation of the amount of energy you use each day. This could be spoons... this could be coins, basically, anything you can easily find multiples of. Each day, you are assigned a certain amount of "spoons". Let's say today, you have 12. That's a fair amount of spoons! Now what are you going to do with them?

For every activity you do today, you're going to give a spoon away.

Got out of bed? I'll take a spoon.

Brushed your teeth? I'll take another.

Showered? More spoons!

Gotten dressed? Yep. That'll be a spoon, please.

And the day kinda goes on like this.

The idea is to end up with no spoons, and no activities left to do. If you run out of spoons but for example, still need to take the rubbish out of the house, or a friend calls around unexpectedly and you have to act as a host for a while, you can borrow against your spoons for the next day - but that's going to leave you with less activities available for you tomorrow.. so you need to be extra careful you're not running on empty!

Sometimes, you have to do just that, which kind of leaves you in a difficult position.

Do you continue trying to do everything? Or do you take a rest-day and recover your spoons?

I love the idea of this "Spoon Theory". For me (and many around me) it makes mental illness, pain management & general day-to-day life so much easier to explain. Within my little group of people, if we're not in the mood to talk, we just use the term "I don't have enough spoons today", and we instantly understand each other and give the space that's needed, or offer support if necessary.

I like to think you can earn spoons back, too. Say you ask for help, maybe it's something as simple as you're hurting when you're putting your coat on, or you have a nagging issue you'd like some advice with. Having someone to help you with your coat, or offer a friendly ear could be a way of making you feel better, and thus grasping at a shiny new spoon to spend elsewhere that day.

It's really helped me in terms of having people understand why sometimes I just can't people. Hopefully, it'll help you, too.

All of the things :

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Essences - Rachel 

Head : CATWA Catya

Eyes : CATWA Mesh Eyes 

Eyes :  LOTUS. Lovely Eyes @ The Chapter Four

Brows : Viena :: Perfect Eyebrows Brown @ Bodyfy 

Blush : Izzie's - Winter Blush (Former Gift)

Ears Hairband : Included with the +Spellbound+ Honey hair

Hair : Tableau Vivant \\ December @ Collabor88

Collar : Kenvie - Gold Ring Choker - Brown (You can get a version of this collar FREE @ Consent!)

Dress & Cardigan : =Zenith=Cardigan Sweater with Shirt Dress @ Kustom9 (Opens 15th Dec) (Note : If you have ANY type of boobs, this dress is going to flatten them. I mean pancake flat.)

Nails : Astralia - Compatible mesh nails system

NailPolish : alme.   Fall Palette II - Shiny 

Rings : Amala - The Lumi Stacking Rings 

Bracelet/Watch : E-Clipse Fiocco Watch (Former Gift)

In the end.

Pose : <K&S> Bloom Male pose 2

Background : MINIMAL - Sevilla Backdrop //1//@ TMD

So i'm sitting here wondering about what to type here. I'm naturally over thinking because of the little weirdo that I am, and the only thing I keep thinking is "Hey, you're Man-Pickle. Talk about boobs!"

I'm not quite sure that's appropriate. >.>

For today I'm going to stick to the items I'm showing. And let's begin at the hair, because DUDE. Look at my effing HAIR!!! 

I squealed rather loudly and in a very un-masculine way when I accidentally fell upon this hair from Speakeasy. Turns out the entire store has been re-done. It looks so good! It's also been separated into specific areas, so you can find poses, shapes, hair & tattoo's a whole bunch easier now.

The hairbase comes with the hair, and yup! Love that too!

Complex has been bashing items out left right and centre. There's no doubt the guy is working his butt off at the moment, bringing out new items in new events. As a fairly new brand he's definitely one to watch. Not only does his mesh fit perfectly, but the styling is 100% on point for anything urban.

Obviously, one of my go-to stores for sneakers right now is Versov, and these don't disappoint. Man-Pickle is wearing the gold version because he's kinda a baller on the down low, the kind of dude to give that hot chick a grin and make her entire world stop for a moment, before jogging to catch the next bus, cus yanno, he's a baller, but keeps it real.

All of the things : 

Body & Hands : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body 

Skin : STRAY DOG - JASON 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Stanley 

Eyes :  LOTUS. Lovely Eyes @ The Chapter Four

Freckles : Bossie. freckles 

Beard & Beardbase : Unorthodox Remix Facial Hair @ TMD

Hair & Hairbase : { Speakeasy } Rav Hair

Ears : ^^Swallow^^ Drop Ear 

Necklace : Nova - Nail Necklace 

Tracksuit : COMPLEX / ANDREI_HOODIE_& COMPLEX / ANDREI_JOGGERS @ TMD

Sneakers : [ VERSOV ] AMYOV_GOLD @ TMD