Hard to deal with.

Pose : Bossie. Belle Pose 02

Background & Props :  [BH9] - The Subway V1 @ Backdrop City

YO_V.boy-004 

YO_People Talking

I went grocery shopping a couple of days ago.

I know. For most of you, that'll consist of a regular day, but for me... well some of you will know that I didn't leave the house for a pretty long period of time and have only recently started dipping my toe back into the outside world... so it has challenges.

I slept the night before, which is a giant leap forward. Recently, I've been worrying about my forays into the real word to the point where I couldn't sleep. This time however, I woke up at a reasonable hour and then realized I had two hours before I left the house. 

Those two hours mainly consisted of me over thinking every possible scenario in my head. and instead of this occurring in an overtired, sleepy Pickle brain, it was now occurring in an incredibly well rested Pickle brain, so therefore the scenarios were slightly more elaborate. I had to get cash out. What if the cash machine were broken? What if I saw someone I know, and had to explain where i've been for the past 400 years? What if I had to ask someone for help, what if I couldn't reach the ketchup, what if they were out of butter, what if what if what if???

Not only was I incredibly well rested, but I also only had two hours to panic, so for two hours, poor Potato sat on Discord with me while I made stupid noises, spoke out loud in half formed sentences because I often talk to him in my head, and made flapping noises by covering my hands with my giant sweater and for whatever reason pretended I was a bird (Not literally, but that was the action). 

Whenever I'm anxious, my leg always twitches too, so I had that going ten to the dozen too.

Anyway.. I managed to go. I left the house, I got my groceries, and I came home and locked the door and haven't actually left the house again yet - but tomorrow, tomorrow I will...

The only reason I write all this is because that's MY battle, and everyone has at least one going on in their lives.

Please, remember to be kind. That crazy lady that needs a little extra help to reach the eggs might just be trying to sort her shit out. That screaming child in aisle four might be autistic and completely out of their comfort zone. All manner of ailments both mental and physical affect people, and sometimes you just can't see them by looking. 

Be kind, always.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Lefort by REVOUL Chanel CatwaGenusLelutka App (RE20) @  A+ Event

Eyes : REVOUL - Revoulutionary Beauty Eyes @ Shiny Shabby

Eyeshadow : Veechi - Devotion Shadow @ soiree

Hair : .Entwined. Vilde

Dress & Cardigan : .miss chelsea. Ines Set @ Uber

Bag : =Zenith=Unicorn Bag (Super old gacha)

Boots : [BREATHE]-Taniki Heels @ FaMESHed X

Look twice.

Pose : [La Baguette] Caprice3

Background : anxiety %cellardoor

I had a really, really vivid dream last night. It was so detailed and so much like a movie, that when I was woken up by my alarm (yes, it's Sunday, but fudge, I'm trying to be normal!), I knew how it should have ended. I knew the characters backstories. I knew how they'd gotten to the point I was at when I was disturbed.

It floored me a little, and I remember reading about Stephen King, who is meant to write about his nightmares and a part of me wondered if I should be doing the same. 

This wasn't a nightmare, but there were parts that could have been horror/thriller.

I'm considering trying to take an SL Picture to encompass my dream, and maybe I'll tell you more about it in the future. In the meantime, have some pretties from Miss Chelsea, Breathe & Dappa.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-PIPER 3.3

Skin : [Glam Affair] Giada Applier

Eyes : -SU!- Medora Eyes /Glitch Wasted/ (Gacha)

Ears : ^^Swallow^^ Dragon Ears 

^^Swallow^^ Gauged Ear

Septum :  DAPPA - Septum X. @ TLC

Eyeshadow :  -SU!- Katja Eye Makeup 

Hair : pr!tty - Daydreamer (Gacha)

Cat-ears : #Foxy - Lace Cat Ears 

Choker : Eclat - Strap Buckle Choker

Tattoo : DAPPA - Savage Tattoo.@ The Seasons Story

Outfit : .miss chelsea. Ulla Set @ N21 (opening tomorrow, Jan 21st)

Fishnets : Bossie. fishnet tights 

Shoes : [BREATHE]-Kimika Heels @ FaMESHed

High like you.

Pose : Bossie. Bella Pose 04

Location : My maybealmostfinished (?) >Homestead< It's not really public, but it's not really private either, so yanno, nose around and shit!

You may or may not have noticed I took a little breather. It was unexpected and yes, only a couple of days so maybe you didn't notice, but I missed -this-!

I found out rather appropriately that January 2nd is considered "World Introvert Day". So I introverted... and again on the 3rd... because I can.

I hope you are well rested from the holidays, maybe a little heavier from all the delicious foods, but hopefully content. 

Thank you all for your readership - I don't think I say that enough, but I'll try to more now that you have your very own nickname (Spoonies. I swear, it's gonna be a thing. Please. PLEAAASE!!)

Anywho. I've been awake for an extraordinarily long time and now I'm going to give you credits and pass out. Much love!

xoxo

All of the things :

Body : Slink Physique Hourglass Mesh Body  

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : DeeTaleZ *Appliers* GENUS Head "Roxana"

Ears : L'Etre - Pure mesh ears  

Hair : Lamb. Mirror Kisses @ FaMESHed

Waistcoat : BUENO-Mini Vest @ FaMESHed

Nails & Rings : [CX] Essential Dirty Claws ( 2019 NEW YEAR GIFT )

A matter of time.

Pose : Bossie. nyanko ecchi pose 03 (Over-ridden by the props in hands)

Props : -Narcisse- NY Photobooth - 13. Top Hat Gold @ LootBox

-Narcisse- NY Photobooth - 7. Star Glasses Gold @ LootBox

-Narcisse- NY Photobooth - 6. Lips Kiss @ LootBox

Decor : -Narcisse-  NY Photobooth - 18. Mystery Frame Memories @ LootBox

-Narcisse-  NY Photobooth - 18. Mystery Frame HNY @ LootBox

-Narcisse- NY Photobooth - 2. Rare HNY Banner Gold @ LootBox

hive // black tie balloons & Confetti For 50L Friday

{moss&mink} Bailey Bed @ Uber

{moss&mink} Heart stud table - Light

{moss&mink} Lace-up Chair w/blanket 

{moss&mink} Modern Princess - Princess Kitty RARE

{what next} Sunflowers Pitcher

[ARIA] Arlette decorative tea sandwich stand

_CandyDoll_Fancy Rug 

Taken in the BUENO-Silence Skybox- RARE

Happy new year!

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Insol: Nina applier @ Kustom9 

Eyeshadow : Veechi (I'm really not sure which one, but it's a liner and it's probably for LOGO head because that works with the omega system in the Genus head)

Ears : L'Etre - Pure mesh ears 

Hair : *barberyumyum*B01

Outfit : .miss chelsea. Leah Loungewear @ N21

Restless lungs.

Pose : Bossie. Lisa pose 05

Background : MINIMAL - Manhattan Scene @ Kustom9

I retreat quite a lot, but today I'm having an SL get-together with some of my inworld family.

I'm kinda nervous about this. I've been with this particular family for almost a year now, but because I am quite an anxious Pickle, I've kept myself back from actually getting to know anyone outside of my "Mum & Dad". That means that I'm now over-thinking meeting all the people I haven't yet met. 

I was introduced to my mothers parents yesterday, and that went surprisingly well! 

I used to think SL families were a really weird concept, and then I was persuaded to make a child avatar by one of my besties and wham... I was convinced they were awesome.

I think they're basically like everything, RL or SL. They're your own little community.

I've been through a fair amount of drama within the families I've been associated... Narcissistic mothers, Flirty fathers, Jealous siblings and a bunch of other unrelated nonsense... but let's be fair, everywhere you go there's that risk, and the only choice you have to make is whether or not the people you surround yourself with are people who make you happy, feed your spoon consumption and don't take more than they're willing to give.

So sure, I'm nervous as fudge... but I'm also excited.

Excited because these people are potentially new friends, and despite my difficulties in interacting I'm lucky to have been given the opportunity to meet people that mean something to my existing SL family. We have games and maybe a movie, and some gift exchanges planned, so yeah, I'm anxious... but it's pushing me to open up, and that's gotta be good.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Essences - Lora (Genus) - Wearing pale01 tone, with ginger eyebrows. @ Kustom9

Eyes : LOTUS. Nocturnal Eyes (previously at N21) 

Hair  & Hat : DOUX - Danna hairstyle @ Equal10

Sweater : SPIRIT - Deca top @ C88

Pants : .:villena:. - Zip Trousers - Plaid Red @ Kustom9

Shoes : [BREATHE] -Ruby Heels

What a life.

Pose : Bossie. Bella Pose 03

Photo taken at my practically unfurnished home (I R LAZY)

I've been asleep most of the day today because HI! I'm Pickle, and my sleeping schedule is back to being absolutely shite! For that reason, have the details without a load of waffle from me!

xoxo

I decided to add another picture of the Go&See Skin here, it's entirely unedited except for the background, taken in CAIWL windlight and I'm wearing the TAN version of the skin. All tones are available in the powder pack! I'm wearing hair from Tableau Vivant, and a Hairbase from Just Magnetized.

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Go&See * Candy * For Powder Pack

Face Tattoo :  *Bolson / Tattoo Cronopios Collection - Knoxx @ TMD

Eyes :   LOTUS. Sparkle Eyes (mesh)  @ Vanity Event

Earrings: LaGyo_Midnight Runaway Earrings - Black @ Access

Hair : *barberyumyum*S07

Collar : - Fika - Hollow's Neck Piece @ The Winters Hollow 

Bodysuit : .:villena:. - Sheer Leotard + Crop @ Kustom9

Take me with you.

Pose :  Infiniti . - Little Kitten - 5

Location : Guilty Pleasures (BDSM RP Sim)

I took my picture today at my friend Juniper's sim. Now at the beginning I wasn't even really looking to take a photo, I was just being a nosy Pickle, but when I wandered around a little, I found there were some absolutely fabulous nooks perfect for photographs.

I realize I haven't shown much in this picture, but that should only encourage you to go and take a look for yourself! Please remember it is a roleplay D/s & BDSM area, and it is ADULT themed. Enter with a respectful mindset and I have no doubt you'll be at home.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Skin : TRES BEAU MAKEUP CATWA BAE

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyebrows : Bossie. autumn eyebrows [catwa]

Eyeliner : -SU!- [HUD] Essential Eyeliners (Catwa)

Lipstick : -SU!- Nixu Lip Gloss +CATWA APPLIER+

Hair : tram H1020 hair

Collar : -Narcisse- Delicado Choker @ Vanity Event

Bruises/Tattoo : DAPPA - Magical Bruises. @ Equal10

Top : [Cubic Cherry]x[CX] - {Dooboo} Top @ Romp

Panties : Solange! Black thong

No surrender.

Pose : *!R.O!* Archer BENTO Pose (Includes mesh bow, not used)

Bow & Quiver : Ariskea [ Sentinel ] Gacha (from a LONG time ago)

Location : Lost Lagoon

I want to start off this post with an absolutely massive shout-out to Reve Obscura poses. Without seeming to blow smoke up the butts of one of my sponsors (and making it entirely clear that they do indeed allow me the use of their items as a sponsor), they are without doubt one of the best bento pose makers in SL, according to the shapes I enjoy wearing.

Bento poses (and any poses for that matter), tend to need a little tweaking whether that's by adjusting the shape of the avatar, or the use of the god-sent Animare hud (available on marketplace >Here<)

With Reve Obscura, there have been very few times I have had to make adjustments, or use the animare hud, and for that reason they will remain a go-to for me. I have purchased several of the poses before they've been distributed to bloggers - that's how much I love this store!

I got a little disappointed again today, because I received another rejection from a store that I love. 

I make sure I only apply to stores and events I adore, I won't fill out an application for a place I don't genuinely want to support. I have massive, massive issues with the selection process, and I entirely believe that 90% of the time, likes and faves on flickr or social media determine the outcome of your application. I'm not -active- active anywhere on flickr, facebook or any other platform, and that's a choice I make because I do not want to a. cause unnecessary drama about my personal opinions, especially because most of my opinions are stated in this blog quite plainly, and b. it's not in my nature to sit in on this "fave for fave" or "share for share" environment that seems to be essential to 'getting your name out there'.

Don't get me wrong, I entirely applaud every single blogger and photographer purely because I know how much effort goes in to each and every post/photo. I have no issues with hitting like, sharing, or favouriting photo's I genuinely love, but I am NOT going to do it for every single picture in the hope that I get the same treatment back. I don't think that's fair, and it's kind of like giving a child a trophy just for taking part in sports day.

I hear crazy stories about people sitting on flickr for three hours a day.. an hour in the morning to catch up on photo's they've missed over night, an hour at lunch time where they backtrack over any  pictures from the morning, and again before they go to sleep so they can fave the ones they missed since lunch. I'd much rather chill out and pretend to be busy elsewhere than feel that kind of pressure for likes.

I realize that my theories on this can potentially be controversial, but it's something that plagues my mind daily. For that reason, I will continue to meander along, enjoying the talented sponsors I am currently lucky enough to blog for, and keep putting myself out there when a spot comes up at a store I am crazy about, fully aware that I'll likely miss out! 

With all that gotten out of my system, here's the stuff you really want to know! More beautiful items from FGC, the theme of this round is "Wild West, Cowboys and Native Americans, West world & Firefly inspired." You can find more information on the website >Here< 

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : TRES BEAU MAKEUP CATWA Hailey

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyebrows : Bossie. alice eyebrows [catwa]

Eyes : HERMONY / EYES OF THE BEHOLDER @ TMD

Hair & Headband : Lamb. Zelda II

Head & Body Tattoos : [Demonic] Nuwuvi Tattoo & [Demonic] Yuma II Tattoo @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

Dress, Headpiece & Rings : ERSCH - Volla Gacha @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

Fur hoodie & Leg pieces : [I<3F] Thyra @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

C'mere!

Pose : Foxcity. Sits Vol3-5 (Fatpack exclusive)

Background &  Props : .:Joplino:. Backdrop Lazy Nights @ Backdrop City

+Half-Deer+ Corgi Puppy - Lazy Friends (Gacha)

+Half-Deer+ Dog Clutter - Pink - Toy Rubber Ball

+Half-Deer+ Dog Clutter - Pink - Leash on Floor

+Half-Deer+ Dog Clutter - Pink - Toy Bone

BUENO-Pizza Boxes (Gacha)

+Half-Deer+ Fast Food Clutter - Spilled Soda Drink (Red)

+Half-Deer+ Fast Food Clutter - Soda Drink (Red)

Whenever I feel like I can't people successfully, I pet.

It doesn't usually happen for long periods of time, mostly just a couple of hours, but recently, I've kind of started to absolutely adore being a puppy.

I know there's a D/s term for this nonsense, but I don't have a Dominant, nor am I looking - mostly because I have a Jake, and having a Jake (luckily with a Punky attached) has been far more successful for me than having an official Dominant!

When I'm a puppy, or a kitty, or a faun, or any other kind of animal-style-thingy-ma-bob, it's entirely probable that I'm feeling slightly more vulnerable. There doesn't have to be a particular reason for my vulnerability and often, there isn't ONE reason for it... it's a culmination of things that just make me want to retreat slightly and stand at the edge of the crowd rather than finding myself central to the action. It's my time to reflect.

Where many true Babygirls may have 'little space', I find myself to be better suited to 'pet space'. I suppose both are a bit weird if you don't understand the concept!

Oddly enough, when I feel in a 'pet' kind of mood, I also feel more creative - which leads on from what I was saying a couple of days ago. Somehow being vulnerable, or allowing myself to feel the way I need to in order to heal myself, I am far more able to feel like 'me' despite the fact that my avatar might run around with a tail and ears.

I'm a bizarre little Pickle, and ultimately, I suppose I'm just glad I'm able to have this outlet to throw out my random ventings and occasionally pretty pictures!

Wishing you love and light!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : TRES BEAU MAKEUP CATWA BAE

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyes : {S0NG} :: Bubble Eyes 

Tears : Dirty Secrets ~ Bento Tears 

Eyebrows : Bossie. sarah eyebrows 

Ears : L'Etre - Basic mesh ears 

Puppy Ears : c h i m e r a . Dog Ears (Made for Furry avatars and resized, SCULPTED not mesh)

Bindi : TONY -- Sailor Scouts Moon Jewel (No longer available, but there's a lot similar!)

Goggles : Kenvie - vintage Goggles - Black RARE (gacha)

Hair : little bones. Alias @ Equal10

Tattoo : DAPPA - Apex Tattoo. @ Equal10

Collar : .random.Matter. - Cermet Collar - Do Not Feed

Shirt & Pants : EVANI - Jenny @ Kustom9

Nails : -SU!- Livana Nails .GothBabe. 

Sneakers : REPRESENT - Holy Grails "Classic"

Another life.

Pose : [La Baguette] Caprice poses 7

I have a busy day today! I'm quite excited, actually.

Back in around May, I shaved my head. It was something I had considered for about 6 months.Thankfully, it wasn't because I have suffered any kind of physical sickness, but more because my waist length hair had been left uncared for, and the only way I could think of to make everything better and actually begin some kind of self care routine in terms of my hair was to start over. It was around a number 5 when I shaved it, so no, not all the way down to the scalp but pretty darn close!

I have never had hair shorter than my shoulders before, and my hair had definitely become a way for me to hide. I would pull it forward and use it almost like a curtain. If I can't see you, you can't see me... kind of like how I imagine Peek-a-boo works with babies!

Shaving my head was incredibly scary, but also strangely liberating. If you haven't already watched "Nappily ever after" on Netflix, I thoroughly recommend you do, whether you have afro-style hair or otherwise, her journey is inspiring.

Anywho, today my hair has gotten long enough for me to actually get it cut into some kind of style.

I'm hoping for a Pixie-like cut, kind of like Emma Watson from "The perks of being a wallflower", but I'm not a Hollywood actress, nor am I in my early 20's, so we'll have to see exactly how that works out!

The location for today's shoot is a mystery, and will be revealed upon it's completion. I know, you can barely see a barred window, but who doesn't love a little mystery in their life??

Have a wonderful Thursday!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Lara Hurley- Beth

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyebrows : Bossie. alice eyebrows 

Sad make-up : DeeTaleZ MakeUp CATWA & STANDART "SAD"

Birthmark : [okkbye] bold birthmarks 

Lipstick : From the Catwa hud

Nose piercing : [VEX] Double Crossed Nosering

Hair : TRUTH / Batty (VIP Group Gift)

Collar : Choker :  #SHOOK - Identity Choker [Crybaby] @ The Level Event

Love Bites : Arise Love Bites 1

Sweater : BUENO-Carrie Top @ Collabor88
Nails : -SU!- Livana Nails .GothBabe.
Rings : Kibitz - Nightmare ring set 

Panties : [VALE KOER] WAIST PANTIES BLACK

Tattoo : DAPPA - Swarm Tattoo. @ Vanity

Shoes : Reign - ROME LACE UP HEELS

I don't want sh!t.

Pose : *Eternal Dream* Feral 04

Background/Props : +Half-Deer+ Starlit Spiderweb 

LAGOM - Springmist (tinted)

“Will you walk into my parlour?” said the Spider to the Fly,
 'Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy;
  The way into my parlour is up a winding stair,
   And I've a many curious things to show when you are there.”

- Mary Howlet

This is a theme I had been toying with since I found the Cureless eyes at previous round of Fifty Linden Fridays. I was slightly upset to realize they aren't add-on attachments, but in fact tattoo's/makeup - but they are so beautifully drawn, I am ultimately not disappointed.

Also, please please check out this beautiful skin from Lumae, I haven't been able to showcase it as well as I would like today, but I will definitely be wearing it again, as it is stunning!!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : ! Lumae Fantasy : All Heads - Elentari // Neutral 

Head : CATWA Magy

Eyes/Tattoo : CURELESS[+] Quattrocular & Space Eyes 

Lipstick : Bossie. colorpop lipsticks 

Spider on tongue : /N-R/ (bento) Spider on Tongue

Whiskers : CURELESS[+]  Dragon Halfbreeds / Dragonwhiskers COAL

Hair : AD - soca 

Horns : SG Arotia Horns (Gacha)

Pauldrons : ieQED scale.pauldron.titanium (No longer available)

Collar : Random.Matter - Feral Collar

Tattoo : DAPPA - Royal Tattoo. @ Access

Outfit : #EMPIRE - Buckle - Harness 2 @ The Arcade

Extra arms : + Extra Bento Arms + {egosumaii}

Creepy hand : CURELESS&DISORDERLY / Disembodied Witch Hand / Closed RARE (Gacha)

Hand Claws : [CX] Shredder Claws

Leg fades : Alterego Leg Fades

Feet Claws :[CX]Canidae Claws