Nothing really matters but...

Pose : FOXCITY. Breezy-2

Before I go to sleep, I like to Youtube. I have a pretty select number of channels that I actually enjoy, from your generic make-up artists to more newsy type things, and sometimes even a good ol' conspiracy.

I was watching Philip DeFranco last night, he's a news type dude, but will give you the facts then if necessary he'll give you his opinion. I like this a lot. He seems fair, he doesn't appear to have an agenda, and I've been finding out some really cool shit about the world that I'd never have known before, because the mainstream news just makes me want to punch kittens through boredom.

Last night he mentioned how Instagram was going to start making likes on their posts less visible in order to raise the quality of content people were posting, and my dead little heart SOARED. THIS. This whole principle is exactly why I am planning a break, to distance myself from the "Likes = quality content" crap surrounding blogging and photography. I want to bring content to readers/viewers of my blog that adds something to their lives, whether that surrounds RL mental health issues and my perspectives, or something in SL that bugs me. I want to be slightly more informational, maybe more pictures indicating the quality of the product i'm blogging, maybe a feature on a sim, maybe more close ups and definitely more informational vlogs, which will hopefully increase in quality the more I practice!

My opinions will be broadcast even more. So if you don't like this part of my blogging, you can totally skip over it (probably like you already do, right?) and if you do, well you're gonna be in for a treat! 

The other advantage of me stepping away from the Likes debacle, will hopefully mean that I don't value the opinions of strangers on my work, and this external validation that I feel necessary will deplete. I know I'm decent at what I do, and if that makes me a big headed, entitled cowbag, I'll take that title. I know I 'deserve' things that other people are getting, but I also know that as much as I deserve what other people are getting, so do many many bloggers and photographers that are far better than I am, so why not just take that whole 'competition' aspect I feel from blogging away, and turn it back into what it should be, what it has been in the past, and what I love... a place I can show my style, give information and overall have some bloody fun.

Just today by taking away the "Omg I gotta" aspect from my photo, I feel like I encapsulated a side of the Pickle avatar that had been long forgotten, and it came easily. 

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (Original)

Skin : . MILA . Neave Skin [Honey] GENUS 

Eyes : Veechi - Foxy Eyes @ UBER

Eyeliner :  Veechi  - Basic Glossy Liner

Hair : -FABIA-<Vitalina> @ The Gacha Garden 

Necklace : MINIMAL - Camera Necklace *Gold*

Shirt : evani. Polly ribbed dress @ Collabor88

Do what you do.

Pose, Lightsaber & Debris : *!R.O!* Force BENTO Pose 

Location : Mother Road - Mirage Motel 66 - Public

So today I think I blew up the world a little bit...

I don't mean that in a bad way, but the more I blow up, the more I realize that this is what needs to be done to rebuild.

I need to be a little vague right now, until I've actually decided 100% how to approach my plans, but there's going to be a few changes to my blog, how I blog and probably the over-all look of my blog. I've spent a long time (almost 4 years) feeling like I don't belong, so rather than attempting to fit in to a community that hasn't really offered me any support other than the early access to events and the occasional promo of stores looking for bloggers, it's time for me to really, really blog for me - to practice what I preach.

I'm nearing my 1000th post. I think that'd be a great new start... there might be a short break in between there, but as I attempt to make a difference to my RL, it's time I address my SL too, especially if I want to use the platform in a far more healthy way.

xoxo

All the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : CATWA Kittia

Skin : Catwa Skin applier - Peach - Snow (Enfer Sombre*)

Eyes : LOTUS. Humanity Eyes @ The Gacha Garden 

Hair : -FABIA- Mesh Hair   < Passion> @ Dubai Event

Mask : CURELESS [+] Procedure Mask / VINYL WHITE CLEAR

Bodysuit : evani. Alice bow bodysuit @ Uber

Arm : [omnis]  BlackWidow/2 
Shoes : [BREATHE]-Mayuko Heels-@ Uber

Always waiting.

Pose : FOXCITY. Legs for Days-4 (Slightly edited with Animare)

Background & Prop things : {moss&mink} Tufted Chaise @ FaMESHed

{moss&mink} Oversized Pouf @ FaMESHed

*HEXtraordinary* White Dogwood Vase

*HEXtraordinary* White Dogwood Wreath

Mutresse-Exhausted-Shortie Cats

dust bunny . fresh fruit stand . lemons

dust bunny . quirky planters . pug

dust bunny . at home baking . lemon plant

Apple Fall Antique Ladders w/ Heart String

Kalopsia - Faith's Mirrors

{vespertine}- spider plant.

Taken in the 01. Lagom - PinkKink [Skybox] RARE (Not sure if this is at an event, but thank you so much for the gift, Cutie!)

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : CATWA Kittia

Skin : Catwa Skin applier - Peach - Snow (Enfer Sombre*)

Eyes : [JOE SL] GIGI MESH EYES SKY GREEN 

Eyeliner : -SU!- [HUD] Essential Eyeliners (Gacha)

Eyebrows : Bossie. miki eyebrows [omega] 

Ears :.random.Matter.  - Natural Elfie Ears

Freckles : [okkbye] Faux Freckles from an old edition of Powder Pack

Hair : DOUX - Valentina hairstyle 

Headpiece : *HEXtraordinary* Pink Dogwood Wreath - This isn't meant to be worn on your head, but I shoved it there anyway! Some editing may be required :P

Necklaces : .random.Matter. - Kashina - Necklaces @ Equal10

Tattoo : DAPPA - Nocturnal Tattoo @ Anybody

Dress : evani. Polly ribbed dress @ Collabor88

Shoes : [BREATHE]-Hoshiko Wedges @ Access

Without a scratch.

Pose : <K&S> Loveliness pose 1 (Slightly edited with animare)

Background : WeArH0uSE [tunnel] Backdrop (it was at Cosmopolitan, but i'm not sure if it's the current round)

How easy it is to be sucked into the negative!

I heard somewhere that for every bad thing you hear about yourself, you hear 13 good things that you glaze over because you've taught yourself not to believe them, so now, whenever I hear someone who doesn't know me say something bad about me, I'll try to recall just five nice things I've heard from people who do know me.

Don't get me wrong, I know I have bad points, but let's face it, unless it's coming to you in the form of asked for constructive criticism, it's going to often appear like an attack... which will probably put the initiator on the defensive, and there's your argument start point.

I won't argue anymore. I can't. I'm too tired.

Instead, I'll internalize, and most of the time I'll come to the conclusion that when it really, really isn't me initiating the negative, it says more about them than it does me.

Love and light.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : CATWA Kittia

Skin : [Glam Affair] Serenity Applier [ Catwa ]

Eyeliner : -SU!- [HUD] Essential Eyeliners (Gacha)

Eyes : LOTUS. Camouflage Eyes 12 

Eyebrows : [okkbye] bucolic eyebrows (catwa)

Ears : ^^Swallow^^ Magic Pixie Ears 

Glasses : -[TWC]- Asshole Glasses -CLr BLk-

Hair : .Shi : Sa-Rah

Nose ring & Choker : Spookshow - Abyss Set

Tattoo : DAPPA - Claudia Tattoo. @ Kinky Event

Jacket : Native Urban - Melo Jacket @ Uber

Shorts : EVANI - Hanna shorts [LATEX RARE](Gacha)

Shoes : [BREATHE]-Tomomi Patent Heels @ Kinky Event

One in a million.

Pose : FOXCITY. Play Ball-6m (Fatpack Exclusive)

Props : *alirium* DownyGrass [Green]

*alirium* PuffyGrass [Green]

LB_FlowersBed{Daisy}

Apple Fall Oxeye Daisy Patch

This picture got me thinking about making daisy chains as a child. I'm kinda old (shh.) so it wasn't unusual to find me in my back garden, sitting cross legged threading daisies from the grass through one another to make long flowery jewelry to adorn my head, neck and wrist, and occasionally my ankle.

That lead me to wonder how to correlate daisies to people... and as I was doing my washing up (ew!) it hit me. When I made the chains in my back garden, some of the daisies would droop while others would thrive. After a few days, I'd replace the droopy, limp flowers with fresh new ones, slotting them in to my creation without even thinking about it. Some times, I would make holes in the stems of the flower using my thumb nail and others, the daisy would be tied tight with a knot.

That is how they relate to people. Our relationships are bound by the slightest thread... the stem of our daisy. Some relationships get tied tightly with the strength of a knot, and other times, we open ourselves up to fit the needs of another. At times, our relationships wilt and we replace old friends with newer, fresher friends that fit our growth pattern.

I guess the only thing that is important in this is reminding ourselves what we want our garden to look like. Which flowers we want to pair with ours that bring the fragrance out as a beautiful medley and enhance our beauty by bringing their own special needs in to our soil. It's also important to weed regularly, because heaven knows how easy it is for someone to suck the nutrients from your roots...

Happy Tuesday, Spoonies.

xoxo

The revoul skin show comes in 5 tones. My favourite being RE20, shown in my main pictures.

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : GENUS Project (Original)

Skin : Lefort by RevoulChontei CatwaGenusOmega @ The Skin Fair

Eyes : {S0NG} :: Ange Eyes 

Ears : L'Etre - Ringed mesh ears

Hair : Stealthic - Dawn @ Kustom9

Hairpiece : Astralia - Daisy spring wreath 

Shirt & Bag : EVIE - Fanny Spring @ Equal10

Shorts : evani. - Tessa @ Kustom9

Where do we go?

Pose : FOXCITY. GSits VOL2-2m

Background :  anxiety %formaldehyde

This one has been a bit of a labor of love, as I've kind of been toying with this picture for about 6 hours. I mean, that's on and off... with short bursts of SL shopping and RL interruptions (girl's gotta eat, yanno.)

I love the outfit too, everything. From head to toe! As usual you can grab some CAIWL unedited pictures below, so whatcha waiting forrr?

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-PIPER 3.3

Skin : [Glam Affair] Maewe Applier 

Ears : ^^Swallow^^ Dragon Ears 

^^Swallow^^ Gauged Ear

Eyes : -SU!- Medora Eyes /Glitch Wasted/ (Gacha)

Hair : #7 Sintiklia - Top style - Hair Jayla - Blacks&whites (Gacha) @ Arcade

Mask : DAPPA - Antisocial Mask. (Formerly @ The Fetish Fair)

Choker : random.Matter - Feral Collar [Silver/Old] (Group Gift (50L Fee))

Tattoo : DAPPA - Moon Tattoo.~@ The Skin Fair

Outfit : evani. - Missy @ Whore Couture 

Boots : [BREATHE]-Tanami Heels @ Uber

No fire.

Pose : Go&See * LoveBites * 9

Hi!

I am so amazingly thrilled with the way this picture came out I may have done a happy dance.

Sometimes, I can take a picture and love it and it's done in 4 minutes.

Other days, it takes me a while.

If it's not the pose, it's the lighting. If it's not the lighting, it's the background. Sometimes my hair will stick through my clothing, or my finger will dig into my body, and i'll have to spend up to an hour editing all those little pieces to make the picture fit together the way it does in my head. 

Today was one of those days, and I had to step away for a while, and come back and carry on.

There was a questionnaire that went out for bloggers to voluntarily fill out at some point... and I remember reading the questions and wondering whether i'm the only person in the world who experiences moments like I mentioned above. When it asked "How long does it take you to do a blog post from concept to completion?" I really didn't know how to answer. Some days, I can do it all in maybe two hours. Other days, it literally takes me ALL DAY... and the chances are before I've even started to take the photograph, I have had a conceptual idea in my head for at least half a day previous, sometimes a week or more, depending on deadlines.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining! I freakin' LOVE doing what I do, and I suppose in a way I am lucky that I can currently devote the time to it that I do.

I guess what I'm saying is that you really can't judge effort, or growth by looking at one picture... and that's true of people as much as it art.

xoxo

Soooo.. Shook has come out with some pretty effin' awesome nail addons. They come for Slink & Maitreya, and you can change two layers. I've enclosed a couple of gifs, and hopefully that'll be enough to set you on your way to understanding how these nails work. You can choose to have an ombre effect with two colours of your choice using the hud, or if you select both colours to be the same, you have some stunningly gorgeous single colour adornments for the tips of your fingers.

I'm wearing the Square version of the nails, and I'm using the metallics hud for varnish.

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Essences Nari @ Kustom9

Eyes : LOTUS.Soulful Eyes 

Eyeliner : Veechi - Basic Matte Liner

Face Tattoo : DAPPA - Sinner Face Tattoo. @ Men Only Monthly

Glasses : -SU!- Poison Sunglasses

Hair & Hat : -FABIA- Mesh Hair   < Azara>  @ TLC

Dress : evani. - Ingrid dress @ Uber

Nails : #SHOOK - Baddie Claws {Short Square} @ Whore Couture 

Falling into nothing.

Pose :  FOXCITY.  - Me time -5     

Background & props : FOXCITY. Photo Booth - New Beginnings (w/white exterior)   @ Backdrop City

 CUREMORE / Lost Paradise / Forbidden fruits (Red) (Gacha)

Decor from Mesh India

Draw the symbolism from this wherever you can, because I'm not sure I'm entirely confident what I was going for!

I'm a sleepy Pickle today, so have some credits, yeah? We'll talk tomorrow.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Eyes : -SU!- Medora Eyes /Glitch Wasted/ (Gacha)

Eyeliner : Veechi - Basic Glossy Liner

Lipstick : -SU!- Matte Lip Essentials 

Earrings : Saga  Boho Princess Earring 

Headpiece : CUREMORE / Lost Paradise / Wreath (Fire)(Gacha)

Hair : [LeLutka]-SALOME hair (I'm not sure if this is still available.. sorry!)

Dress : evani. - Ingrid dress @ Uber

Nails : Ascendant - Pretentious Nails 01

Shoes : [BREATHE]-Momoka Heels @ The Arcade (March 1st)

For you.

Pose : Started with FOXCITY. Lucid-3m Edited with Animare

Props : *HEXtraordinary* Flutterfly Bush - Blue

*HEXtraordinary* Venomous Tentacle Vine

*HEXtraordinary* : Cranky Baby Mandrake

*HEXtraordinary* Frumious Blubbersnort

*HEXtraordinary* Screeching Snap Seedling

*HEXtraordinary* Carniverous Geranium

*HEXtraordinary* Flutterfly Bush - Lavender

*HEXtraordinary* Gray Owl - Flying

*HEXtraordinary* Screech Owl - Perched

*HEXtraordinary* Saw-Whet Owl - Perched

*HEXtraordinary* Brass Owl Cage

DRD - Series 01 - Bookcase Mess - Dark

DRD - Series 01 - Bookcase - Light

uK - Mystic Dew Mist Green

Kalopsia - Flying Curtain 

DISORDERLY. / Book Magic / Magical Birdcage

DISORDERLY. / Book Magic / Magical Potions

DISORDERLY. / Book Magic / Magical Suitcase

[ zerkalo ] Huge pile of books RARE (Gacha)

{moss&mink} Forever & Always (only Always)

I blame Narcisse for this extremely over-the-top Harry Potter themed post today. If the gorgeous little Seeker Necklace had never been dropped, I could have avoided this nonsense, instead, I went full Potter-head and grabbed a bunch of HEXtraordinary items too, because what's better than a little bit of Potter? A LOT OF POTTER!

I also feel like I could potentially be Harry & Hermione's lovechild, thanks to the glasses and the hair... but I'll leave that for you to decide.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : CATWA Magy

Skin : Lefort by Revoul.Chun Catwa Applier @ Kustom9

Glasses : NS::  Kitty KaWaii SHADES @ Fluffy Kawaii

Hair : [LeLutka]-SALOME hair (I'm not sure if this is still available.. sorry!)

Necklace : -Narcisse- Seeker Chain - Gold @ World of Magic

Dress : EVANI-Bamboo dress 

Shoes : [BREATHE]-Natsuyo Heels @ Belle Event

Beautiful but broken.

Pose : Foxcity. Observe-6m

Background : FOXCITY. #MOOD Gacha - 5 - Staged (Common) @ Backdrop City

As I was editing this last night I was talking to two of my friends in SL that I consider family.

For me, family in SL has always been a difficult label to achieve. I've had families in the past and it's caused nothing but trouble - in fact, I'm still healing from one of my SL families, and that sounds insane to say for something that is supposed to be a game. However, these two friends of mine are my Glam-ma (Memaw) and Grandpa (Pepaw). I had a bit of a mental health revelation last night and just needed to talk, and luckily, these two beautiful souls were right there and listened.

Not only did they listen to me, but they also shared their own journeys, and they made me feel like I wasn't alone, as though I truly belonged around them, and like I could turn to them, no matter what.

I jokingly said that the photo above got all those feels edited into it, and the more I think about it, the better I feel like there couldn't be a more true statement. I feel like the Pickle shown in the picture is confident, loves and accepts herself, and those are feels that my 'family' confirmed. My grandpa actually asked me "What is your worth, Pickle?" and I answered "Well, I'm getting there, but I'm still working that out." and he said "No. You're priceless. That's how I see you, and that's how I want you to see yourself." 

And now I'm gratefully sobbing into my keyboard at the unselfish show of love both of these beautiful humans managed to share with me last night and every time we speak.

I hope you find your tribe, Spoonies. They're out there, sometimes it just takes a minute to find them.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Insol: Lika applier @ Collabor88

Eyes : LOTUS. Flow Eyes @ Access

Hair : VCO HAIR _ Wonnie (Gacha) @ Kustom9

Tattoo : DAPPA - Damaged Scars. (Fresh version) @ Hentai Fair

Tank & Chain : .miss chelsea. Alva Tank 

Stole :  .miss chelsea.  Saga Stole 

Skirt & Panties : evani. - Millena skirt @ Kustom9

Boots : #EMPIRE - Sissys @ Collabor88

 Hey, have you seen how interactive the Evani Skirt is? Ok, so it's also a reason to stare at my butt, but hello! How cool is this? It comes with a hud so you can black/whitelist the avatars you actually want to be able to use your skirt, or you can keep it public and let anyone lift the skirt. Kinda love it!

Almost you.

Pose : FOXCITY. Sits VOL3-4m

Decor : {moss&mink} Venus Sofa &{moss&mink} Modern Arbor (Dark) @ FaMESHedX

{moss&mink} Modern Princess - Princess Kitty RARE (Gacha)

{moss&mink} Floor Cushion GIFT

dust bunny . spicy fiesta . chips & guac

Soy. My Laptop

I have more pretties for you today!

The Chanel skin from Revoul is available at the brand new A+ event, and the pretty eyeballs are at Shiny Shabby!

I'm wearing the 'new' Lelutka head Piper, but the skin also comes available for Catwa, Genus and Omega, but as usual, DEMO FIRST because shading and results will vary depending on the head you're using!

Shown above are the tones RE05, RE10, RE15, RE20, RE25, RE30, RE35 and RE40

The skin comes in a no brow option too.. but I neglected to take a picture on that. I'll take my wrist slaps like a champ though!

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-PIPER 3.3

Skin : Lefort by REVOUL Chanel CatwaGenusLelutka App @  A+ Event

Eyes : REVOUL - Revoulutionary Beauty Eyes @ Shiny Shabby

Hair : [monso] My Hair - Terri @ Soiree

Necklace & Earrings : Cae :: Basics - Solitaire 

Top : EVANI - Emi top [Fullpack]

Nails : Ascendant - Pretentious Nails 01@ Shiny Shabby

Pants : EVANI - Molly jeans