I am so amazingly thrilled with the way this picture came out I may have done a happy dance.
Sometimes, I can take a picture and love it and it's done in 4 minutes.
Other days, it takes me a while.
If it's not the pose, it's the lighting. If it's not the lighting, it's the background. Sometimes my hair will stick through my clothing, or my finger will dig into my body, and i'll have to spend up to an hour editing all those little pieces to make the picture fit together the way it does in my head.
Today was one of those days, and I had to step away for a while, and come back and carry on.
There was a questionnaire that went out for bloggers to voluntarily fill out at some point... and I remember reading the questions and wondering whether i'm the only person in the world who experiences moments like I mentioned above. When it asked "How long does it take you to do a blog post from concept to completion?" I really didn't know how to answer. Some days, I can do it all in maybe two hours. Other days, it literally takes me ALL DAY... and the chances are before I've even started to take the photograph, I have had a conceptual idea in my head for at least half a day previous, sometimes a week or more, depending on deadlines.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining! I freakin' LOVE doing what I do, and I suppose in a way I am lucky that I can currently devote the time to it that I do.
I guess what I'm saying is that you really can't judge effort, or growth by looking at one picture... and that's true of people as much as it art.
xoxo
Soooo.. Shook has come out with some pretty effin' awesome nail addons. They come for Slink & Maitreya, and you can change two layers. I've enclosed a couple of gifs, and hopefully that'll be enough to set you on your way to understanding how these nails work. You can choose to have an ombre effect with two colours of your choice using the hud, or if you select both colours to be the same, you have some stunningly gorgeous single colour adornments for the tips of your fingers.
I'm wearing the Square version of the nails, and I'm using the metallics hud for varnish.
I have tons of things for you today, but before I start, I wanted to address something potentially a little sensitive.
I've been seeing a lot of "My favourite bloggers are..." on facebook lately, and as someone who is NEVER mentioned on these things, it can be a little disheartening. So, for a moment today I went into a bit of a "Fuck, why do I bother?" mode, but luckily, only for a moment.
You see, it suddenly dawned on me again that although I LOVE the opportunity blogging gives to me, I don't actually do it for other people. I do it because -I- love it. I do it because I've been able to watch myself grow and evolve over the three year period I've been doing it.
Like most people, though, I do have the terrible habit of comparing myself to others. I'm not the greatest, most talented photographer out there, but I have watched as I improve, and I always attempt to show the products off in a light that is flattering and real, and along with the content I provide in my blog, I'm actually incredibly proud of what I've achieved.
The other thing that suddenly dawned on me was that although I've had nobody on facebook shouting my name from the rooftops, I've had incredibly artistic friends of mine compliment me lately, and although I know that they're my friends and part of their job is to blow smoke up my ass occasionally, I am actually starting to believe their praise, that is pretty effin' cool!
The moral of my rant is, regardless of your position in terms of appreciation for what you do.. do it. Whether you're someone who can fart and be congratulated for your work, or whether you're someone who rarely gets noticed, if you're enjoying it for heavens sake, continue to do it! Don't be scared of new things, and continue on with what you love, because you really can't please everyone all the time.
That said, happy Tuesday and have some more info!
xoxo
The Ariana skin from Revoul is available at Kustom9 NOW!
It's got 7 possible tone ooptions, each one as beautiful as the next.
Not shown here are the "no eyebrow" version, and that's just because i'm lazy, and also because I'm sure it doesn't take much to imagine the skin without eyebrows. :P
The skin comes with Genus, Catwa and Omega appliers, but once again I suggest a demo before purchase!
Here's the deluxe body options available at Revoul! I'm using the Belleza freya body here, but there's appliers for Belleza, Maitreya, Slink AND Omega for that other body you love but no one provides support for! :P
It's worth a quick reminder here that shape ALWAYS plays a big part in how a skin looks, and that includes with your body. I'm sure it's obvious that there are shading differences on the stomachs here, however, if your skinny body was actually skinny, the skinny applier would look skinnier. Get it? The same goes for the chubby and pregnant versions too.
Personally, I find these incredibly realistic, and I'm absolutely floored that Revoul can offer such different body types done to such a fabulous standard.
Booties : [BREATHE]-Sano Heels-EXCLUSIVE @ The Epiphany (Opens at Midnight tonight) (Note : These heels are the exclusive for the Epiphany, that means you have to use your points to purchase them! Please see the epiphany "How to play guide" to figure out how that works)
I was gonna write a massive rant about flickr vs blogs today. Again.
But,
I realized I'm just a salty bitch... so you're gonna be left with this, instead.
Whatever you do, do it for love.
Some people are going to accept you. Other people aren't going to understand the importance of what you do... but so long as you aren't doing what you do to specifically to hurt others, keep doing it.
Keep on keeping on until YOU don't love it anymore.
Happy hump day!
xoxo
Note : I'm actually pretty mad at myself at the misrepresentation of the hands for the Dappa Tattoo... there ARE hand tats included - but for whatever reason, I'm a total derp and didn't notice that the "gloves" section of my maitreya body had turned off after a relog... :(
Pose (Edited slightly) : #5 <K&S> Him & I. pose 3 (Gacha)
I'm really not in a very good place today. I'm okay. I'm just sad.
I've always had trouble making and maintaining friendships. A lot of that is due to my being a hard-headed, stubborn and opinionated Pickle, and I know I'm not for everyone... but it makes me crazy when I step back and actually figure out that a lot of the problem is that I'm just incapable of accepting people as-is, rather than looking at them in terms of potential.
Yesterday, I spoke to a woman who reminded me of a very toxic person who was in my life for 2-3 years on and off. She kind of reamed him a new asshole, but the only thing I could think of was how sad I was that I couldn't make him a better man. Trust me - he was horrible. He manipulated me on more than one occasion by pretending to be someone else, cheated on me and told me on Christmas, made me wait for him for 6 hrs on my birthday and was generally just a butthead... but there was a part of me that wanted so desperately to make him good, to have him understand that people need kindness, and I thought that by accepting him, flaws and all, I would be able to do that. I was wrong.
I know this makes me sound like a martyr, but there's been many times where I have pushed the 'right' people away because of a bad situation I was in.. I'm not perfect in the slightest.
I just feel like right now, I've gotten to the point where my little bubble is shrinking rapidly. and as much as I would love to allow every single human into it, I'm incapable. I've become more difficult to please, and while this might seem like a good thing, that i'm picking people who fit me and MY needs right now to stay, it also makes me feel incredibly sad because it's like a part of me wants to give the whole world the benefit of the doubt, and because I'm me, I can't.
Again, not sure where this is going. I suppose I'm just venting, rather than hoping any of this makes sense.
xoxo
Background : FOXCITY. Photo Booth - Two Minds. Black @ Limit8
A couple'a few items here today. Very quickly showing you the undies available in the CandyDoll Epiphany gacha - I have plans to showcase more of this gorgeous set in the not-too-distant future.
Also a few lovely Dappathings! Once again, completely amazed by his work, I'm convinced it gets more detailed and better quality with every tattoo he produces.
xoxo
All of the things, Durex :
Body, Hands & Feet : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body
Man-Pickle is looking a little contemplative today, mayhaps that's because he's a mish-mash of styles in what is essentially a greenhouse.
So let me explain what's been going on in the world of Pickle lately.
Something inside me changed when I posted the "Hold tight" blog (you can find that >Here<).
Part of my issue with leaving the house has been that I was completely caked in guilt and shame. I was horrified that I could be a person who gave up their child, even to family, and that lead to me worrying profusely about how to field awkward questions from people.
I remember vaguely being "okay" enough to leave the house and go to a coffee shop with a friend about 4 years ago. I was fine, until a complete stranger turned to me and said "So what do you do?"
I didn't - and still don't - do anything. I remember not being capable of answering his question. Of sitting there, gripping my latte in my hands, staring intently at the swirls in the milk wondering how I could tell this person I didn't know that I did nothing. That I am essentially a failure. So, being the overly emotional Pickle that I am, I sobbed silently until my friend noticed, and led me out of the coffee shop and took me home. Luckily, she's an amazing, understanding woman who is completely supportive of me.
FLASH BACK TO TODAY.
Until two or three weeks ago, I hadn't left the house for 18 months. When I received the outpouring of support I suddenly realized that although there are people who will no doubt sit and judge, there are also people who will not only completely understand what I am going through, but will also hold me up and cheer me on.
I've always held to the belief that there was a switch in my head that needed to be flipped, that one day I would wake up and want to change... and I can only describe what happened as the switch flipped. Things had got bad. I was dating shitheads in SL that I allowed to abuse me (that's another story, after all, how can you be abused in SL?). I wasn't taking care of myself, or my home. I was ignoring everything that meant anything, because I just couldn't deal with the fact that I was such an epic failure and how could I POSSIBLY be any use to anyone, given the mess I'd already made. Essentially, I was alive - but I wasn't living.
Now don't get me wrong, things haven't magically improved to the point that all the negativity I felt has dissipated. I still harbor a ton of negative thoughts... but now? Now I feel like I need to live. I need to get up off my arse and do something. I need to try and make a difference in the lives of the people around me that mean something - REAL LIVES.
So, I've been making slow changes. I visited my parents and my daughter over the last few weeks, and this weekend I stayed there.
I've been to the doctors. I'm now starting the steps I need to take - steps I have taken in the past, that now feel entirely different - to get myself healthy. I am taking medication. I'm going for blood tests. I'm starting to fight back.
I'm not saying everything has changed - I'm incredibly weak right now, and this is going to be a terribly long journey, a journey I have started and failed in the past... but again, this time, it just FEELS different.
I am not only being honest with myself for the first time in a long time, but I am being honest to people around me, and I hope that in the long run, SL will become less of a crutch for me, and I will be able to use it in a healthier, more productive way. I hope that I'll become a proper, functioning member of society.
I don't doubt that I will have bad days - today especially is emotional, and I think that's just because over the weekend at my parents I was forced to not only socialize, but also to see things in real-time that I had been happily ignoring for a long time.
Once again, I have no idea what the point of this post is, other than to act as a form of therapy for me, so selfishly, that's what I'm doing. Maybe, just maybe, it'll help you too.
xoxo
All of the things :
Body, Hands & Feet : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body
