Super short one today because the whole vlog ordeal made me so anxious I'm kinda exhausted... plus Potato Man's internet seems to be stable atm so I'm literally making grabby hands at him!
All of the things :
Body, Hands & Feet : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body
I don't do much RL online shopping, but I decided to peruse Amazon after getting a voucher for Christmas. I'd always been interested in those funky charcoal masks, so I picked one of those up first, and then still had enough left over for something else.
I'm not sure if I've mentioned this book before, but it's called "Yes Man" and it's by a guy called Danny Wallace. He's an English dude, and the way the book is written is right up my alley. Complete sarcasm, infused with utter nonsense, with a little bit of a moral, too. Because I liked that book so much, I picked up a copy of another of his books, called "Random Acts of Kindness".
I expected this to be very similar to his previous book, but it is in fact, entirely different.
It's literally just a list of suggestions of how to make someone's day a bit better and I can't describe how much I freaking love it. There's ideas anywhere from planting a tree, to buying a tub of coleslaw for a Portuguese man called Rui, and applauding someone for making an effort.
On that note, I want to invite you to do something nice for someone today.
Doesn't have to be much, doesn't have to cost you a thing... but just do something that will make them smile, and sit back and see how it affects you, too.
Location : My homestead (kinda public, kinda not.. be nice!)
So yesterdays adventure into the real world was absolutely freakin' exhausting.
I've started getting really, really anxious before something happens that means I have to leave the house, and although I DID manage to go to my parents special Anniversary dinner, it was nothing short of a miracle,
At around 5am Sunday morning, having not yet slept and knowing I'd be leaving the house at around 10am, I found myself in my kitchen having a bit of a melt-down. I wish I could explain all the thoughts in my head, but anyone who has a tendency to overthink and/or suffers with anxiety will be able to tell you it'll start with something very simple, and end up with your chest heaving while you're clinging on to the kitchen cabinets for dear life while the kettle boils somewhere in the far off distance.
I did consider saying I couldn't make it. Just for a minute, of course... but I knew if I said no this time, it might be a really long time before I said yes again, and I can't have that. I have to do these ridiculously basic things with the people I love, not just for them, but for me.
The advantage of my managing to drag my half-undead body from my flat to the restaurant was that I ate a bloody amazing meal, and my dad got inebriated while my brother, who was driving, sulked playfully at being sober over his rather yummy looking steak.
All in all, it was totally worth the anxiety and I'm glad I didn't miss another family milestone.
Taken in the Apple Fall Country Hall @ my homestead.
Ok so my brain has well and truly been up my backside today, and I've neglected to think of a subject to write about, also, tomorrow I will be going out with family for my first 'public' meal since I've been feeling better... so that's possibly weighing on my mind a little. I mean, who wants to sit a freakin' restaurant with a bunch of people they don't know, feeling super self conscious while celebrating a 40th Wedding Anniversary?
I actually asked my Dad how he felt about being married to my mum for that long, and I was hoping/expecting for some beautiful sentiment or maybe at a push, something flattering about his children (eg, me.) but no. The response I got was "To be honest, I'm kinda numb to it now."
Now I'm remembering and giggling to myself like a plonker!
In other news, TMD is open, Lads! Go grab your new things!
Photo taken at my (potentially forever) unfinished home.
I've been reflecting a lot today, and I just wanna put it out there that I can be an asshole.
By asshole, I mean sometimes I just cannot keep my mouth shut.
For me to make sense of things, I need to vent.. and sometimes my choice of who I vent to can be somewhat uh.. fucked up.
See, I kind of have this habit of blurting, whether I've just met someone or I've known them for a while, I often scoop myself all the way up onto my high horse and preach to the hilltops about my personal opinions. While I'm much more confident in my opinions lately, that doesn't mean that everyone needs to know them, nor does it mean they care. I need to remember this.
I do have a habit of talking shit, too. Nothing that I can relate to 'gossip' as such, it's more like I'm really trying to work out WHY something happened, why I feel the way I do about a situation, what -I- could have done differently and why someone else reacted the way they did.
If I "talk shit" there's a 90% chance that I have already told the person I'm talking shit about how I feel, but again - that's not really anyone else's business. and it's certainly not my job to point out the flaws of others when I am so un-perfect myself.
I was considering the idea of new years resolutions today, and I think I've decided what mine is. I don't often make resolutions, because I feel like for the most part they are unrealistic, but for 2019, I want to do better at dealing with a situation and moving on. For my own sanity, I need to let things go, confide more in people that genuinely care and aren't just floaters in my life, and I definitely need to mind my own fucking business.
I really want to project positivity, and if I'm concentrated so firmly on other people and how negative they are (to ME), I will never achieve the serenity inside myself that I'm aiming for.
Lemme start off by saying a big thank you to Apple, who is currently "Apple Bottom" and did indeed, lend me her butt. TA LOVE!
I think it looks like Man-Pickle has been behaving badly in this photograph. Maybe he's pinched Apple's butt one too many times and she's sent him out of the cabin to think about what he's done while she tidies up his awful mess and eats her breakfast in peace. Man-Pickle is however considering all the ways he could get her back, and contemplating dumping the contents of the marshmallow bucket in her hot chocolate! Is that really a bad thing though?
When I saw this artwork by UnKindness I inwardly squealed.
Overthinking? Why yes. Yes I do!
I can literally overthink ANY subject. Seriously. Give me a subject!
While I don't necessarily enjoy the overthinking thing, I do definitely see some benefits. Apart from people regularly saying "You're thinking about this too much." I honestly believe that the way my thought process works is actually kind of beneficial to me.
Because of my amazing brain, I am now capable of talking myself IN to a situation I would have before avoided and vice versa.
Overthinking has granted me open-mindedness, I can see situations from many angles, and decide upon a path correct for me while considering all sides.
The struggle I have is the stubbornness that occurs once I think I've thought about everything from all angles. See, when I've made my decision, and it's actually a decision and not just an "Okay im gonna do this for now", it is incredibly difficult for me to sway away from that, and I'll do everything within my power to stay doing what I said I was going to do.
I'm currently overthinking this entire Pickle-rant, because it very nearly took an entirely different spin and ended up thirty paragraphs long with a detailed conclusion - so before that happens, I hope you enjoy today's Man-Pickle Monday, and allow your brain to take a breather. If you learn how, let me know... I'm almost certain mine is exhausted!
I'm sorta kinda loving this picture! Durex and Pickle make the most adorable couple!
I wanted to talk quickly about the use of animare on poses.
If you don't know what animare is, you can find it listed on MP >HERE< and though I'm sure there's many things you can do with the version linked, all I use it for is to modify poses slightly.
For example, in the above picture, Durex's hand was pushed into Pickle's head far too much, but with a couple of animare tweaks, it popped out and the pose was saved.
Please note, this doesn't mean that the pose is broken, or doesn't work... each pose is made with the specific body-type of the pose maker & advertiser in mind and you as a consumer are expected to modify your shape to fit or not buy the pose at all. Demoing poses IS important if you are unprepared to do this! Being that in SL we are all now capable of having a variety of shapes and a myriad of bodies are used, tools such as Animare come in very handy for photography and modelling purposes, and on investigating marketplace it seems like there's a new option that will allow you to modify a models pose too... so I might look into that for the future!
Anywho, go explore the things!
xoxo
Today I'm joined by a mystery guest, because he's shy... and the only thing I know he's wearing is the pants, from legal insanity @ Fameshed, so uh, go there if you like them!
In this picture, we're in a waiting room. I'm not really sure what kind of waiting room it is, but we'll pretend it's for something innocuous like... dentistry *nods*.
I'm sure it's not for anything serious, as Man-Pickle has perfect, sparkling teeth akin to a Hollywood movie star. *shrugs*
Anywho, there's details below so check them out!
xoxo
Here's a natural light picture of the skin by Clef de Peau, and the face shape from Cataclasm available at TMD.
