Caught off guard.

Pose : Ana Poses - We See

Decor :  [USB] - Industrial Table (Adult) @ TMD

 Apple Fall Handbag & Scarf

Taken in the Apple Fall Country Hall @ my homestead.

Ok so my brain has well and truly been up my backside today, and I've neglected to think of a subject to write about, also, tomorrow I will be going out with family for my first 'public' meal since I've been feeling better... so that's possibly weighing on my mind a little. I mean, who wants to sit a freakin' restaurant with a bunch of people they don't know, feeling super self conscious while celebrating a 40th Wedding Anniversary?

I actually asked my Dad how he felt about being married to my mum for that long, and I was hoping/expecting for some beautiful sentiment or maybe at a push, something flattering about his children (eg, me.) but no. The response I got was "To be honest, I'm kinda numb to it now."

Now I'm remembering and giggling to myself like a plonker!

In other news, TMD is open, Lads! Go grab your new things!

xoxo

All of the things, Durex :

Body: [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body

Skin : Not Found - Robert Skin 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Skell

Hair & Hat : Vango. Joe

Ears : [MANDALA]STRETCHED_Ears_Season2 HUMAN

Nails in ear : [CX] Heavily Nailed (Group Gift)

Beard & Scar : IDTTY Faces - Sharp Beard [CUT]

Tattoo : DAPPA -  Shiryo V2 Tattoo. @ Limit8

Sweater : TORI TORRICELLI //  Dakota Turtle Neck Sweater @ TMD

Pants : TORI TORRICELLI //  Dakota Chino @ TMD

Sneakers : .TORI TORRICELLI Downtown Sneakers @ TMD

All of the things, Pickle : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : DeeTaleZ *Appliers* GENUS Head "Roxana"

Ears : L'Etre - Pure mesh ears  

Hair : *barberyumyum*S03

Glasses : #SHOOK - Lunari Sunglasses

Necklace : (Yummy) Supernova Necklace 

Shirt : BUENO-Rucy Top For The Saturday Sale

Pants : .:villena:. Destroyed Mom Jeans
Shoes : [Juju] Lorelei Cream

It all comes to an end.

Pose : FOXCITY. Lean-1

Decor : Balderdash - Green Stardrop creeper

Refuge - Spring Gala Table White

Apple Fall Coffee & Muffin

hive // potted plants . gold dust dracaenas . pot b

 ::KKs:: lace curtain - flying 5

 Taken in the BUENO-Room at the Top -Forget- RARE

I got a lil emotional with this picture. When I took it, it looked like Pickle was super sad, and I jokingly said to my Potato that it was because she'd made plans to go on holiday with a boy, and the boy turned out to be a pooper... and now she's celebrating the new year alone. I like making stories up, but this one made me have a bit of a cry-baby moment. However, after I'd added my edits, I rather think that Pickle looks like she's kinda hopeful, and that hits the nail on the head as to how I feel right now.

This last year has been completely epic. I'd been in a rut for the longest time, unable to see a clear light at the end of the tunnel, and somehow around the May, with thanks to a post I wrote in this blog... things started to change.

I've literally shaved my head from waist length to above my fricken ears, I've started leaving the house - something I hadn't done for two years - and that's not an exaggeration, I literally hadn't felt fresh air on my skin from being outside for two flippin years. I've actually figured out how to survive outside of SL by taking responsibility and giving a shit about myself.

Don't get me wrong, I haven't done this all myself.

I have been blessed with the support of friends I have never met - some of which are still present in my life, and some of which aren't, which is sad but in some cases extremely necessary to my growth process. 

I have made some of the worst mistakes of my life, and still been forgiven, and I've finally started to forgive myself, too.

I never wanted to ramble on. I believed that I didn't have anything of worth to say, but forcing myself to sit and write has made me feel entirely differently. I have had people reach out to me, thanking me for my courage. "My courage" seems like a ridiculous statement. I did nothing brave, I just wrote. I admitted my issues and addressed them... but without sounding cliche, if that helps - i'm extremely proud of being able to contribute something positive to somebody else's life.

It's almost as though writing has given power to my thoughts, to the positivity I want to project. It's allowed me to value myself before others, to focus, and to give to people the best of me because I am aware of the right times to say Yes and No.

Next year, I won't have resolutions... but I will have a continual theme, and that will be to project the positivity, not to focus on the things I can't change, and to keep on keeping on.

You should, too, because it really does get better.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Not Found - Jada Skin Toffee (Genus)

Body Skin : [theSkinnery] 

Hair :Beusy: Yayo Hair & Bandana @ Kustom9 

Dress : BUENO-NYC Dress @ Kustom9 

Cardigan : ISON - agnes cardigan

Leg warmers : Addams - Nuria LegWarmer

A better time.

Pose, bowl & whisk : FOXCITY. Breakfast Bento Pose (Previously at Uber)

Decor (Hold on to your hats!) : {moss&mink} Christmas Cookie Mix for LTD Christmas, available @ the mainstore.

Sari-Sari - Gingerbread Men

dust bunny . at home baking . bag of sugar

DRD - The Bakers Fail - Cake Counter (Note : Sim Sale! Up to 75% off!)

Apple Fall Pan Rack

Apple Fall Handbag & Scarf

Mutresse-Fascinated-Witty Cats

Bazar - Torronto-Slippers

*Tentacio* Mia's bakery pet 1 (Gacha)

Taken in the Scarlet Creative Magicae House

Season's Greetings Spoonies! (I've decided that I need a name for you lovely readers, you can thank my new-found adoration of Youtube and tutorials, and the fact that people like James Charles call their supporters and subscribers SISTERS and uh, things.)

Today I am actually thrilled with the way this picture came out. I love it all, so excuse me while I toot my own horn reveling in the lighting and basically everything. I really hope I'm turning a corner with my photography, sometimes I feel like I 'get it' and other times it just falls a bit short. 

Durex has popped up again, so make sure you say hi! He's obviously me. So basically I'm just asking you to pay attention to me twice. *blinks*

I slept too much today which has led me to being awake at 3am, and writing this absolutely insane blog post. However, things are better than good for me right now, and I am genuinely okay. I feel like it's been a while since I could say that and mean it, so that's really, really lovely.

If you're struggling, just know you're not alone. Know that there are others who have been in similar shoes, and you are strong enough to get through whatever trials you're currently facing.

I truly believe in flipping that switch in your brain from "Oh no, I can't." to "Oh, maybe one day." to "Fuck yes, I can!", just remember, it's not gonna happen over night, and despite taking two steps forwards and one step back... you're making progress and that deserves to be celebrated.

xoxo

Let's not talk about Pickle's lazy eyes, ok? Thankyousomuch. ♥

All of the things, Durex : 

Body: [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body

Skin : Not Found - Robert Skin 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Skell

Hair : [INK] Hair_TAIT @ TMD

Beard & Scar : IDTTY Faces - Sharp Beard [CUT]

Tattoo : DAPPA - Descend Tattoo. @ ManCave

Sweatpants : Lenox Arctic Pants @ TMD

All of the things, Pickle : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Insol: Nina applier @ Kustom9 

Hair : bonbon - vina hair - (FREE GIFT!)

Ears : L'Etre - Crystal mesh ears 

Bra top : BUENO-Crochet Bikini 

Dress : *Tentacio* Mia's bakery dress (Gacha) - (Note : This is made for maitreya, but i managed to fit it over my belleza freya shape with minimal clipping (countered with my body hud). The bra included with the dress does NOT fit belleza freya)

There's a feeling.

Pose : Amitie Couple You Are My Gift - Ball @ Uber

Background Things : Abiss Christmas Tree 2014 

Say hi to Durex! He does alright, does our lad! 

Today I wanted to make a valiant effort to show off some of the fantastic tattoo's Dappa is producing. I feel like I blink, and he's gotten a brand new product at another premium event, so trying to keep up with him is insane - but Pickle loves a challenge!

I'm showcasing two today, one on Pickle and one on Durex, and although Durex's may not be entirely christmas themed, I felt like the colours fit in perfectly for a scene.

I woke up today with intentions of getting stuff done.

What actually happened was incessant zoning out, ridiculous videos watched on youtube and a whole heap of Ark, Survival Evolved. Welp. There's always tomorrow!

xoxo

All of the things, Durex.

Body: [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body

Skin : Not Found - Robert Skin 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Skell

Hairbase : Stealthic - Male Hairbase

Hat : [Atomic] Happy Hats_Let's Be Festive! - Santa's Helper 2 @ Epiphany

Beard & Scar : IDTTY Faces - Sharp Beard [CUT]

Tattoo : DAPPA - Chak Tattoo. @ Level Event

Pants : Loris Loren - BATTISTA V3 FATPACK

All of the things, Pickle :

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin & Eyelashes : [okkbye] bunnie tone001 

Blush : TS Omega Cold Days Heart Blush Applier @ The Arcade

Hair : *barberyumyum*P01

Lingerie : #EMPIRE - Xmas - Bowed - Panties - red & #EMPIRE - Xmas - Bowed - Bra - red (Gacha) @ The Arcade

Tattoo : DAPPA - Noel Tattoo. @ Liaison Collaborative (New LM!)

I won't let go.

Pose & Dogs : .Focus Poses. Couple 27

Location : Somewhere in time (Sim now closed)

Almost exactly a year ago, I wrote a post about how my soul had collided with someone.

You can read that post >Here<.

Somewhere along the way, because I'm stubborn as fuck, we got a little lost.

However, in recent weeks, we've been spending a little more time together as and when circumstances permit, and everything I wrote back then has started to make sense, all over again.

What better way to celebrate our reaffirmed friendship than to re-take one of the pictures that started my revelation, and helped me along my journey? 

I'm so glad to be holding hands and walking with this amazing human, once more.

In another bizarre twist of fate, the Somewhere in time sim has now closed, and I can't help but feel like this is a beautiful tribute to a gorgeous sim, despite my little pictures never being able to do it justice. Looking forwards to seeing what the owners of this lovely location pull together in the future!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Not Found - Jada Skin Toffee (Genus)

Body Skin : [theSkinnery] 

Jewelery : :: SAGA :: Verena Jewel Set Gold

Hat & Hair : Unorthodox Yonce 

Dress : BUENO-Fly Dress @ Uber

Vest : BUENO-Fly Vest @ Uber

Boots :  REIGN.- Not Your Momma's Knit Boots (Super Old Gift!)

Where you should be.

Pose : K&S - // I just love you // Bento pose (Slightly edited with Animare)

Pupper (not included in pose) : O.M.E.N - Christmas Morning - Puppy - Beige

Decor : {anc} NOEL. :  tears tree / 9Li RARE (Gacha)

DRD lazy Christmas chair

I'm so happy with how this picture turned out!

I roped in Durex again, because let's face facts - I gotta love me more than anyone else!

xoxo

All the things, Durex: 

Body: [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body

Skin : Not Found - Robert Skin 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Skell

Beard & Scar : IDTTY Faces - Sharp Beard [CUT]

Hair : Vango. Alex

All of the things :

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project (babyface)

Skin : Essences - Luisa (Genus) @ Kustom9

Eyes : Go&See * Babe * Genus Eyes

Lipstick : The Face ~ Genus - Original ~ Lipsticks palette

Hair : tram H1116 hair @ Uber

Tattoo : DAPPA - Mehndi Tattoo. @ Ultra

Lingerie : #EMPIRE - Xmas - Wrapped - Panties & #EMPIRE - Xmas - Wrapped - Bra @ The Arcade

Big bad.

Pose & Basket : Fashiowl - Dangerous Path - 5 @ Enchantment

Background Wolfie (on an alt) : (HYBRIDERA) - The Lunar (This is legit SO OLD it's still prims! Not sure if it's been updated, but for the sake of this picture, it worked perfectly.)

Wolf's pose : Imitation - Miguel 2

Propstuffs : Skye Studio Enchanted Forest 

HPMD* Dirt Road

{anc} mist cloud 

[DDD] Swaying Leafy Bush 

Jian :: Fox's Fallen Tree (Former Freebie!)

Jian :: Bunny 

Jian Goat

HPMD* Little Birds

Enchantment is breathing life into meeee!

Obviously, Pickle is Little Red, running from the Big Bad Wolf hiding in the distance. Naturally, the other woodland creatures (including goats, because there has to be a woodland somewhere with them, ok?) are running like feck too! No one wants to become dinner for Wolfie!

You can find more information on all things Enchantment at their website >Here<

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin (Head) : Not Found - Lia Skin Toffee (Catwa)

Skin (Body) : [TheSkinnery] Toffee

Head :  CATWA HEAD Catya

Eyes & Face Slash : *Rainbow Sundae* Wolf Eyes & Scratches @ Enchantment

Lips, Eyeshadow & Lashes : ~Shiny Stuffs~ CATWA SnowWhite @ Enchantment

Ears : L'Etre - Crystal mesh ears 

Hair : #Foxy - Lovesick. 

Headpiece & Bracelet : *N*SnowWhite & RedRose's accessories @ Enchantment

Outfit : [eVe] - Valerie @ Enchantment

Shoes & Socks : Eudora3D Belle Heels&Socks @ Enchantment

Always me.

Pose : Foxcity Flowers-7m (slim gown)

Background : FOXCITY. Photo Booth - Ballroom (Pastel Multi Chandelier) @ Backdrop City

Honestly, some days my brain is exploding with things to write, but the idea of writing them just makes me cringe...

for that reason, enjoy this gorgeously sparkly dress from Narcisse and some other credited thingy-ma-bobs below!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head & Eyebrows & Eyeliner : GENUS Project - Genus  Bento head  - Mocap (BETA!)

Skin (Head) : Not Found - Sophie Skin @ Cosmopolitan

Skin (Body) : [theSkinnery] Body Applier

Eyes : AMITOMO Eye Collection

Hair : Lamb. Dove @ Uber

Choker : Amala - The Kylie Choker - Thick -  Birthstone Version 

Dress : -Narcisse- Raquel Sequin Dress @ FaMESHed

Rings : (Yummy) Free Spirit Rings

Stockings : .::Dead Dollz::. Sheer Hosiery - Nudite 

Shoes : #EMPIRE - Nemophila 

Legends and myths.

Pose : FOXCITY Play Ball-4

I was so excited about these fairies from HEXtraordinary that I absolutely had to grab them immediately. 

There are a few different colours and options - shoulder sitters, companions, rezzables and the cute lil fae's that are 'trapped' in the bottles. I like to think these are naughty fairies, and they deserve to be there, because why would anyone want to trap such an adorable fantastical fairy.

So, in other news, last night I may have had a small glass of wine or uh, maybe an entire bottle.

I'm not a big drinker, and after one glass (diluted, too, because I'm a complete lightweight), I was definitely feeling the effects.

One of the reasons I dislike drinking is because secretly I might be a bit of a control freak. I don't want to fall into the trap of feeling as though the person I am is dependent on something as fickle as alcohol. It IS a depressant, and I know from experience of working in pubs and of course drinking in my youth (shh, most of us did that), that alcohol has a different way of altering your personality depending on the way you're feeling at the time. I've also been privy to a couple of people who have over-used alcohol as an escape.

Like everything, I suppose it's best used in moderation, and although I had a lovely time with some SL friends, I don't want to repeat the experience too often.

Have a beautiful weekend!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project - Genus  Bento head  - Mocap (BETA!)

Skin (Head) : Not Found - Sophie Skin @ Cosmopolitan

Skin (Body) : [theSkinnery] Body Applier

Eyes : Go&See* Babe * Genus Project Eyes

Hair : [monso] My Hair - Shiranui @ FaMESHed

Headpiece : *LODE* Head Accessory - Kiku Big Crown [tuscan] RARE Not sure where this is from as it was a gift!

Fairies : *HEXtraordinary* Faerie Maidens Gacha @ Gacha Garden

Shirt : Jeune by Rowne.Candice Crop Top (50% off sale!!)

Skirt : *{Junbug}* Olenna Skirt 

Out of touch.

Pose : FOXCITY. GSits VOL1-4 (Alternate hand position)
Facial expression achieved by using the Lelutka Axis Hud

Background & Propthings : BUENO-Fight Club deBasement @ Uber
{anc} mist cloud [sungold]
Various items from the DRD ShadowBox series 01
DRD - fleamarket 1 - antique clock
[The Emporium] Conjuring Salt Circle - Natural
brocante. ye olde clock
Kalopsia - Flying Paper


Pickle, what is you thinking??
Yesterday marked the end of the Halloween month, and here I am casting spells the day after.. and why? Well, quite simply, I'm wanting all those evil spirits to disperse, maybe I need some sage...
Onwards and upwards!
xoxo

All of the things :

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head & Eyeliner : GENUS Project - Genus  Bento head  - Mocap (BETA!)

Ears : L'Etre - Crystal Mesh Ears

Skin (Head) : Not Found - Sophie Skin @ Cosmopolitan

Skin (Body) : [theSkinnery] Body Applier

Eyes : AMITOMO Eye Collection

Hairbase : Just Magnetized - Basic Hairbase - set 14

Hair : Glam Affair&Tableau Vivant \\ Seelie&Unseelie (Gacha)

Collar : #Foxy - Lace Corset Choker & Ears 'Snowball'

Tattoo : DAPPA - Suisai Tattoo. @ SaNaRae

Lingerie : Mossu - Amour.Lingerie

Out of love.

Pose :  Ana Poses - It's ok It's ok It's ok @ TMD

Background : WR - Vernor Vinge

I'm sorta kinda loving this picture! Durex and Pickle make the most adorable couple!
I wanted to talk quickly about the use of animare on poses.
If you don't know what animare is, you can find it listed on MP >HERE< and though I'm sure there's many things you can do with the version linked, all I use it for is to modify poses slightly.
For example, in the above picture, Durex's hand was pushed into Pickle's head far too much, but with a couple of animare tweaks, it popped out and the pose was saved.
Please note, this doesn't mean that the pose is broken, or doesn't work... each pose is made with the specific body-type of the pose maker & advertiser in mind and you as a consumer are expected to modify your shape to fit or not buy the pose at all. Demoing poses IS important if you are unprepared to do this! Being that in SL we are all now capable of having a variety of shapes and a myriad of bodies are used, tools such as Animare come in very handy for photography and modelling purposes, and on investigating marketplace it seems like there's a new option that will allow you to modify a models pose too... so I might look into that for the future!
Anywho, go explore the things!
xoxo

All the things, Durex :

Body: [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body

Skin : Not Found - Robert Skin 

Head :  CATWA HEAD Skell

Hair : Vango. Alex

Tattoo : DAPPA - Valak Tattoo @ TMD

All the things, Pickle :

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Lara Hurley- Beth

Head : CATWA Lona

Hair : DOUX - Grande Hairstyle 
Tattoo : DAPPA - Valak Tattoo @ TMD
Panties : From the BBD - Scarlett Lingerie Set