I'm free!

Pose : FOXCITY. Numb-2m

Decor : *HEXtraordinary* Frozen Kingdom Gacha @ The Epiphany

Including : *HEXtraordinary* Unicorn Ice Sculpture

*HEXtraordinary* Icicle Row

*HEXtraordinary* Ice Crystal 4

*HEXtraordinary* Ice Crystal 3

*HEXtraordinary* Ice Crystal 2

*HEXtraordinary* Ice Crystal 1

*HEXtraordinary* Lil Miss Abominable Companion

*HEXtraordinary* Baby Abominable Companion

[BMS] MyDoll // Snow Day Presents @ The Secret Affair

.:Tm:.Creation Snowy Love Bench scene [BOX] @ The Secret Affair

[DDD] Heavy Snow Backdrop

[DDD] Snow 

This scene was a little bit of a challenge for me, but ultimately I'm super happy with the outcome!

I really enjoy attempting to pull everything together coherently, while attempting to give a little visual story to go along with it. It's definitely a work in progress (as is my photography process in general!) and I'm thoroughly enjoying learning new things and trying new angles!

Happy days are here, and The Secret Affair has opened it's doors for the December round!

You can find more information about the event on the website >Here< or simply take the tp to transport yourself to the winter wonderland that has been created for you to peruse some fabulous goodies!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin & Brows : (Enfer Sombre*) Catwa Skin applier - Nat {Moon} RARE @ The Epiphany

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyelashes & Snowy Face : Izzie's - Snow Face

Jewelry : \//.VoluptasVirtualis - Bianca

Headpiece : *LODE* Head Accessory - Phlox Crown [white]  (Gacha)

Hair : !!Firelight!! Karya Hair (Comes with detachable hat, not shown) @ The Secret Affair

Dress : .Viki. Titania @ The Secret Affair (Inworld store unavailable for SLURL at time of posting)

Bit of an obvious choice for a song this time, but it really was running around my head during the whole creation of this post, so you're welcome for the music mite that will potentially burrow into your earholes! <3

Calling me out.

Pose : BellePoses - Yumi 5 @ Harajuku

Background : anxiety %sempiternal

I've already had to deal with some unpleasant business this morning... twice.

I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut and just move on quietly, but that's just not me - yet.

Aside from my self-inflicted dramatics, I absolutely freaking love this outfit from Miss Chelsea, and you can catch all the details below.

xoxo

I knowwwww, I keep changing my pictures at the moment, but I definitely feel like I'm getting somewhere! This is still a CAIWL picture in ultra, on firestorm. I haven't edited the avatar, but I have edited the background a smidge. I wanted you to see the Veechi Eyeshadow in a clearer context - and it's bootifuls!

All of the things : 

Body Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-MAY 

Skin : . MILA . Alice Skin [Honey] LELUTKA 

Eyeshadow : Veechi - Enchanted Shadow @ N21

Hair : Ade - Grande Hairstyle 

Earrings & Necklace : Izzie's - Gingerbread Man Jewelry

Outfit : .miss chelsea. Kira Set @ Uber

Nails : Ascendant - Pearly Bento Nails 01

Heaven knows.

Pose : FOXCITY. Lounge-2m

Background : WR - really needs a title 

I am so in love with this headband by Narcisse...

and the hair? Hello!

Literally, a perfect combination when you want to feel pretty.

Get it. Immediately!

xoxo

Body : Slink Physique Hourglass Mesh Body  

Skin & Ears : ! Lumae Fantasy : All Heads - Elentari // Neutral 

Head : CATWA Catya

Eyes : -SU!- Ophelia Eyes Fatpack /ULTRARARE/ (Gacha)

Eyeliner : Veechi - Boss Liner @ Collabor88

Freckles : Veechi - Foiled Freckles

Hair : .ICONIC.:CLIO @ The Hair Fair 2018

Headband : -Narcisse- Clio Headpiece @ The Hair Fair 2018

Tattoo : Izzie's - Metallic Arrow Tattoo

Feathers : .aisling. Velasco

Bodysuit : [CX] Taut Amour - HG - Corset - Monotone - RARE (Gacha)

Fall back together.

I used my AO and a tweak with the Lelutka Axis hud to make this pose work.. plus windlights on my platform, so there's no fancy info today!

I am having a very "monster" day today. A day where I woke up feeling pretty darn good, and then progressively started to internalize a bunch of insecurities until I end up blurting at some of my friends. Luckily, I have the BEST friends in the history of friends, and they soon turned my frown upside down.

For that reason, have some credits without some waffle! My poor Pickled brain cannot function beyond the very basics haha. Have a wonderful Friday!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Slink Physique Hourglass Mesh Body  

Skin : ! Lumae Fantasy : All Heads - Elentari // Neutral 

Head : CATWA Catya

Eyes : LOTUS. Balance Eyes @ Vanity Event

Eyeliner : Veechi - Boss Liner @ Collabor88

Freckles : Veechi - Foiled Freckles

Lips : On the catwa hud - black lipstick faded out!

Hair : Stealthic - Fleeting @ Kustom9

Headband : .random.Matter. - Lorac Halo (Not sure if this is still available!)

Horns : Lovely Disarray - Sketched Hellion Horns (Seems these are currently unavailable too, sorry!)

Collar : Messy. Saint Choker Monster @ RLD

Tattoo : Izzie's - Metallic Arrow Tattoo

Friday night.

Pose : [LaBaguette] Imok 3 Mirr

Background : #selfie_RAMA- Vertical Palm Wall 'Pink'

My whole little mental health journey is taking some interesting turns.

It's become apparent to me that there are far more negative energies in me that I was aware of. I mean, I know I'm not perfect - show me someone who is, but recently I have really begun to notice some disturbing patterns. It's not malicious, but sometimes I am hurting so much because of some ridiculous ideals I have in my head, I end up purposefully causing pain to someone else. Misery loves company, right?

Let me explain a little more.

I am not delusional enough to think that I am always right, but part of me is delusional enough to think that I am always right. That means there's a constant struggle in me, the knowing deep down that 1. I cannot control other people and their reactions to my actions and/or words, and 2. sometimes, I'm the toxic one.

Naturally, that fills me with absolute fear, because I don't WANT to be toxic, ever.

Ultimately, now I have recognized these disturbing bad habits, my goal is to change the way I approach those situations. I'm pretty old now, so undoing that amount of "oops no" is gonna be pretty tough, but it's baby steps! As with everything I am discovering about myself and the world around me, I am going to be taking three steps forwards.. before freewheeling two steps back and then starting again.

I'm grateful for those who see the good in me, regardless of my ew, and have been reminded regularly of the quote;

"What you value, you invest in."

and sometimes, you need to invest in you.

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Slink Physique Hourglass Mesh Body  

Skin (Head) : TRES BEAU MAKEUP LELUTKA LUV 

Skin (Body) : S.E  BODY SKIN 

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-MAY 

Eyeliner : Just Magnetized - Classic Liner set 01

Septum & Bindi : 3. ^^Swallow^^ Supreme  Gold and Strawberry 02 (Gacha)

Ears : L'Etre - Crystal mesh ears

Hairbase : Tableau Vivant (I'm not sure of the exact one, but it's for lelutka!)

Hair : [e] Karina

Tattoo : Izzie's - Metallic Arrow Tattoo

Dress : .miss chelsea. Elia Dress @ Kustom9 (Opens tomorrow, 15th Sept)

Shoes : {Zaara} Padma Mojari shoes 

First light.

Pose : *!R.O!* Violin BENTO Pose 2 (Set comes with Violin & Bow, not shown)

Violin & Bow : [GW] Skull Violin Moonstone 

Location : Yorkshire

When *R.O* showed a work in progress of his absolutely stunning set of poses, I internally screamed like an excited child at Disney. 

Many moons ago, when I was just a wee slip of a lass, I was actually fairly decent at playing the Viola. Not many people seem to know what a Viola is, and the only way I can describe it is that it is bigger than a Violin, still held under the chin, and in regards to Orchestral situations, the Violas (being slightly more bass-like) would sit nearer to the Cellos than the Violins.

Back then, I was incredibly jealous of the Violin players. Not only did one of them get chosen as "First Violin" which essentially meant that special person would be second in command to the Conductor (that's the guy waving his stick around looking slightly crazy with his wig falling off if he gets really into it), but it also meant there were solo's and actual recognizable tunes that they were often responsible for. As a Viola player, it was rare (in Orchestral terms) I would get anything fancy to play, and I was always slightly butthurt by that.

However, other than wanting to be a Violin player because of my teenage jealousy, I had a few absolutely wonderful experiences. I was lucky enough to do a small (like, extremely small) tour of Barcelona (where I bought a Real Madrid football shirt, and got chased along a beach by a naked Spaniard), played at the Royal Festival Hall and the Barbican Centre in London and made a few friends that I'll never forget.

In other news, *R.O* stated that this pose set was inspired by Lindsey Stirling. As an artist, she is visually and aurally stunning, and my picture today was loosely based upon her amazing "First Light" video - which I have included below for you to peek at. Please do peek. Please!

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara 

Gold Arm : CURELESS[+] Melodic Doll / Dolly Arm  / RARE @ Epiphany

Gold Leg : CURELESS[+] Melodic Doll / Dolly Leg @ Epiphany

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-CHLOE 3.0

Skin : #Boataom :: Albina AF Lelutka Applier 

Eyes : [ Conviction ] Downer Eyes (ESSENTIALS) /RARE/ @ Epiphany

Freckles : Head - [theSkinnery] Freckles! 

Body - Izzie's - Body Freckles II 

Face Stars : ..miss chelsea. Gaia Face Stars @ Epiphany

Ears : ^^Swallow^^  Pixie Ears 

Earrings : e.marie // Feather Earrings - White @ N21

Hair & Hairbase : Tableau Vivant  \\ Braidy (curly) & .Tableau Vivant  \\ Lelutka HB11 (Gacha)

Collar :  CURELESS[+] Melodic Doll / Doll Choker @ Epiphany

Bodysuit : .Enfant Terrible. May Bodysuit From a former Bound Box

Human foot : Slink Avatar Enhancement Feet Deluxe 

Safe with me.

Pose & Knife : *Eternal Dream* Feral 06 @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

Background & Decor : Violetility - Magic Clans Gacha @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

So it's that time again! By the time I've posted this blog, Fantasy Gacha Carnival will officially be open! That's right, today, 7th May, FGC opens it's doors once again with the theme "Tribe Life, Forest People, Wild Thing, Mamba, Panthers, Feral, Wunderlusters". You can find all about this new round by clicking to the website >Here< it'll not only show you a bunch of the creators and their items on offer, it'll also give you access to all the bloggers lucky enough to be a part of this wonderfully creative event.

All of the things : 

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Skin : Go&See * Hela * Tropic @ Blush

Head : LeLutka Bento Head-CHLOE

Eyes : -SU!-Delora Eyes Fatpack /ULTRARARE/ (Gacha)

Lipstick : . MILA . Princess of Darkness Makeup

Ears : ^^Swallow^^ Pixie Ears 

Hair : Tableau Vivant \\ Faun hair RARE@ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

Headpiece : =Zenith= Hun Archmage Antler (Begie)

Tattoo : Izzie's - Metallic Arrow Tattoo

Outfit : Luas Grenna (Gacha) @ The Fantasy Gacha Carnival

When the cloud breaks.

Pose : FOXCITY. Show Off-4m

Props : Refuge - Nautica Set 

Spargel & Shine Homes Primula Beach House

[NC] - Tropical Palm Tree

When I was small, my family had a caravan by the beach. I use the term beach very loosely, because once again, I remind you this is England, and what was considered a beach was actually about 3 feet of stony/sandy toot with some kinda greyish water.

My Dad asked me to go fishing with him in that awful grey water one day, and I jumped at the chance. I must have been about 13, and he often took my brothers but rarely thought I would be interested. My middle brother had managed to catch an eel a couple of weeks previous, and I wanted nothing more than to prove that I could do better. "Want to bait the hook?" my Dad asked. I died a little inside and shied away from that pretty sharpish.

My Dad bent over to get a maggot from the tupperware pot he used, and what do you know, two £10 notes flew out of his pocket and started to blow down the beach. "What are you just standing there for? RUN!" << My Dad.

So there I am at 13. definitely not a track star, running down a dingy British beach, chasing after £20. I legit run the entire length of that fuckin' beach, and it was like something out of a comedy. I get close, I smack my foot over where the note should land and of course, the wind picks up and off it flies just out of reach. How did I know it was the end of the beach? There's a chain-link fence leading onto a private military area, and the two notes - instead of getting stuck on that fence like they should have - somehow slid right into that private area.

I am devastated. My fishing trip with my Dad has been ruined, and he's going to shout at me. I'm sobbing because even then I'm an emotional wreck. After walking lethargically back to the fishing spot, my cheeks stained with tears and sniveling rather pathetically my Dad stands there with his hands on his hips and says... "I didn't expect you to run THAT far!"

Luckily in SL we have pretty beaches, and fishing is usually rewarded with prizes! The only thing you're going to lose your linden to are the absolutely stunning fashion finds featured right here in this blog! :P (Totes imagined myself as a TV host there. NotSorry)

xoxo

All of the things : 

Body & Feet: -Belleza- Freya

Head : CATWA Magy

Skin : ItGirls - Catwa Skin Applier - Brigit 

Eyes : .ARISE. Sadie Eyes

Hair : Moon. Hair. // Distance @ Kustom9 

Sand Applier : Izzie's - Body & Face Beach Sand

Hands : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara (Yes you can wear your Maitreya hands! Activate SLINK FIT on the Belleza body, but be aware you WILL need omega/maitreya enabled appliers for skins & tattoos!)

Bikini : BUENO-Moon Bikini @ FaMESHed (Opens today)

Speak fluently.

Pose : FOXCITY. Effortless V1-4m

Purse (Over-rides left arm pose) : BUENO -Handbag -Cream (Gacha)

Location :  D 0 X

I'm going to keep this short and sweet today, mainly because I'm hoping to pop out a Man-Pickle post. I feel like he's been neglected lately!

My inspiration for today was the amazing sweater & leggings from CandyDoll. Yes, we're squeeing all over them, why? Well, if you look closely, you'll see that not only is it a bit nipply out, but the butt (shown below) is legitimately amazing. 

Not gonna lie, the whole ensemble took me a minute to put together. Again, some of these items might  be a little on the "older" side of SL fashion, but honestly, the quality is still there, so I'm going to rock all the things in my inventory until they wear out!

When I popped the Little Bones hair & hat on my head I knew I was finally getting somewhere, it really gives the impression that Pickle is a Russian Countess (I don't even know if they have them there, but I'm going with it), waiting for her driver after an expensive luncheon with one of her lady-friends. Mhm, today I am a Lady Who Lunches.

I hope your weekend was amazing, now here are some things:

All of the things : 

 Body, Hands & Feet: -Belleza- Freya 

Skin : Insol: 2 IN 1 skin Diana, ST 'Peach'

Head : CATWA Lona

Eyes : Enfer Sombre* - Cry Baby Set (Former Gift)

Tears : 1. ALTAIR* loony's delicious tears 2. KMS: Animated Tears

Eyebrows : Bossie. alice eyebrows 

Blush : Izzie's - Catwa - Applier Winter Blush (Former Gift)

Hair &  Hat : little bones. Sita II 

Necklace : (Yummy) Secondhand Necklace 

Coat : PLASTIX - Bambi Jacket (White) 

Shirt :  _CandyDoll_Anya Top 

Leggings : _CandyDoll_ Anya Pants 

Shoes : REIGN.- Becca Heels 

Christmas cheer.

Pose : FOXCITY. Milk Bath-5 (Edited with Animare)

Props : {moss&mink} Pod Chair @ The Kawaii Project

:DH: Santa Art

Xmas Sack Over The Shoulder by Melli Imako

Naughty & Nice mugs (holdable) from  {moss&mink}  Whispers @ Pocket Gacha 

dust bunny . present pile & tree cookies

The Loft - Casolare Fireplace Ivory

{what next} Nordic Stockings

I'd like you to imagine I'm Mrs Claus.

My husband, Santa, has obviously been very busy making the children of the world happy. The last month has been especially hard while he tries to get all his deadlines met, and his Elves have been needier than ever. Not to mention Rudolf caught a cold and his nose wasn't shining nearly as brightly as it should have been, so I've been in the kitchen concocting potions (mainly chicken broth) to try and make him better in time for Christmas Eve.Unfortunately for me and Santa that means we've been like two ships passing in the night, kissing briefly under the mistletoe when we pass each other in the halls decked with holly. Now the hard work for this year is over, and I've gathered by the sofa with some cookies I baked (Santa NEVER tires of his cookies), and some warm drinks, along with a few presents I've gathered for Santa to open when he finally awakes from the longest sleep he has all year.

It seems I might have dozed off myself after preparing a feast fit for a miracle man, let's hope he wakes me sweetly!

All of the things :

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Head : LAQ Bento - Motion Capture - Neve

Skin : -Glam Affair - Lola Applier - LAQ Head @ Kustom9

Eyes : LOTUS. Escapism Eyes @ District 20

Nose & Cheek Blush : Izzie's - Winter Blush (Former Gift)

Glasses : [Cubic Cherry] {Anya} glasses @ Okinawa Winter Festival

Hairbow : Astralia - Holidays Flickering bow

Hair : -FABIA- Mesh Hair   < Jill> 

Collar : Ama. : Light Me Up Set For Bound Box December

Bodysuit : #EMPIRE - 90's Body (available in MANY colours!) @ Collabor88

(Faux) Fur Coat : .:villena:. -  Happy Holidays ! (GIFT)

Leg Lights :  :Moon Amore: FALALALA Socks&Lights @ Collabor88

Boots : #EMPIRE - Alstromeria (available in MANY colours!) @ Collabor88

I choose to believe.

Pose : *!R.O!* Renew BENTO Pose (Note, this pose comes with a bird, I just swapped it out)

Robin : MishMish - Robins in the snow 

Location : Luane's World

Spoons.

Many of my friends know and understand the term and I feel like it should be a universal term for, well, everyone.

The original article is >here< and it's written in relation to Lupus. However, I feel like it should be noted that no matter who you are, you have a limited amount of spoons, daily.

The basic gist of the article is that you need a physical representation of the amount of energy you use each day. This could be spoons... this could be coins, basically, anything you can easily find multiples of. Each day, you are assigned a certain amount of "spoons". Let's say today, you have 12. That's a fair amount of spoons! Now what are you going to do with them?

For every activity you do today, you're going to give a spoon away.

Got out of bed? I'll take a spoon.

Brushed your teeth? I'll take another.

Showered? More spoons!

Gotten dressed? Yep. That'll be a spoon, please.

And the day kinda goes on like this.

The idea is to end up with no spoons, and no activities left to do. If you run out of spoons but for example, still need to take the rubbish out of the house, or a friend calls around unexpectedly and you have to act as a host for a while, you can borrow against your spoons for the next day - but that's going to leave you with less activities available for you tomorrow.. so you need to be extra careful you're not running on empty!

Sometimes, you have to do just that, which kind of leaves you in a difficult position.

Do you continue trying to do everything? Or do you take a rest-day and recover your spoons?

I love the idea of this "Spoon Theory". For me (and many around me) it makes mental illness, pain management & general day-to-day life so much easier to explain. Within my little group of people, if we're not in the mood to talk, we just use the term "I don't have enough spoons today", and we instantly understand each other and give the space that's needed, or offer support if necessary.

I like to think you can earn spoons back, too. Say you ask for help, maybe it's something as simple as you're hurting when you're putting your coat on, or you have a nagging issue you'd like some advice with. Having someone to help you with your coat, or offer a friendly ear could be a way of making you feel better, and thus grasping at a shiny new spoon to spend elsewhere that day.

It's really helped me in terms of having people understand why sometimes I just can't people. Hopefully, it'll help you, too.

All of the things :

Body, Hands & Feet : Maitreya Mesh Body - Lara

Skin : Essences - Rachel 

Head : CATWA Catya

Eyes : CATWA Mesh Eyes 

Eyes :  LOTUS. Lovely Eyes @ The Chapter Four

Brows : Viena :: Perfect Eyebrows Brown @ Bodyfy 

Blush : Izzie's - Winter Blush (Former Gift)

Ears Hairband : Included with the +Spellbound+ Honey hair

Hair : Tableau Vivant \\ December @ Collabor88

Collar : Kenvie - Gold Ring Choker - Brown (You can get a version of this collar FREE @ Consent!)

Dress & Cardigan : =Zenith=Cardigan Sweater with Shirt Dress @ Kustom9 (Opens 15th Dec) (Note : If you have ANY type of boobs, this dress is going to flatten them. I mean pancake flat.)

Nails : Astralia - Compatible mesh nails system

NailPolish : alme.   Fall Palette II - Shiny 

Rings : Amala - The Lumi Stacking Rings 

Bracelet/Watch : E-Clipse Fiocco Watch (Former Gift)