I am so freakin' proud of this picture. Once I found out that the theme behind this lingerie set was Burlesque, I immediately knew I wanted to do something fun and feisty, and stumbling across this pose just made me squeal with all the happy.
I've been thinking about choices, and what goes into our making them. I'm not very good at decision making, and while it's true that to some extent I thrive on the dramatic, making choices leaves me with funny feelings in my tummy, and not in a good way all the time - especially if they're important.
Since I've been told I have Borderline Personality Disorder, I've become far more aware of my impulses. I'm incredibly wary as to what I do, and when, and how - because I want to be sure that I'm making the RIGHT choice. But then I overthink that, too, and end up wavering in the grey area until finally I eeny meanie miney mo, and jump right in impulsively anyway.
Anywho. It's Saturday! Have an amazing weekend and make the right choices! :P
This is the final pose from the Reve Obscura Violin set.
I know by now you're probably sick of the violin theme, but I really can't help myself, so on that note (haha, pun - get it? NOTE. Music. Musical note???) I'm going to tell you about my grade five exam for the Viola.
I was around 14/15, and my parents had recently stopped taking me to lessons at the music centre, and decided that it would benefit the family if I took my lessons at lunchtime at school. I hated this, because it meant I had to drag my viola around in it's case for the entire day, and as we all know, musical kids are 'geeks'. It was horrible. The case would bash against my legs when I walked, and obviously there would be cat-calls from the 'popular' kids about what an absolute nerd I was.
The only thing that made me slightly happy was knowing that I would see the super cute boy from the year above at the end of my lesson, because he played the Viola too. Unlike me, he wasn't a geek. In fact, his musical prowess seemed to promote him even further up the ranks in popularity.
I adored him, and sometimes, if we played in the school band, he'd sit right next to me, and we'd even have a conversation.
I was almost convinced it was love.
The day of my grading exam, we were having what was known as a "Mufty day". It's where you get to wear whatever you like, rather than going in uniform. Of course, I was going to a musical exam, and so my parents had absolutely insisted that it was only proper that I wore my school uniform, regardless. I was uncomfortable to say the least. Not only was I a music geek, but now I also stood out because I wasn't wearing my weekend clothes.
Mr Popular was going on vacation later that day, which is important to note for later, so he's looking amazingly attractive in his ironic Hawaiian shirt and shorts, and even though he's a friendly dude, despite our obvious popularity differences he walks down the corridor and points at me "Hey, nice outfit! See you at the exam!"
At around lunch, we jump in the music teachers car and head to the exam location. Me, Mr Popular and the music teachers assistant. Once we get there, we're lead into a big waiting room. Of course, already my heart is pounding, and I've had a pretty crap morning. Mr Popular is going in before me, and then he's running off to go on his family holiday. However, it seems he's forgotten his flipping piano music - but wait! THIS IS MY CHANCE! I come to his rescue, waving the piano music for our exam under his nose. He HUGS me - YES. MR POPULAR HAS TOUCHED ME, and slinks off into the exam room. By this point, I'm a mix of emotion. I'm riddled with fear for the examination, and i'm walking on air, too. My teenage anxiety is now approaching level 9000.
So my turn to be tested has come, but where's Mr Popular? He's got my piano music!
I find out that he's only bloody gone on holiday - taking my accompanying music with him!
Mr Music Teacher runs out of the exam building and flails behind his parents car, trying to catch their attention, but alas, it is too late.... and there I am, an absolute mess of crazy in my disgusting school uniform... and I have to take this exam without my piano.
Turns out it wasn't actually that bad, I went in there sans piano accompaniment, and actually rocked the test, on the way home, in Music Teacher's car, we discussed ways of making Mr Popular die painfully, which really helped! In the end, I passed and he didn't. Karma. Oddly enough, I didn't fancy him after that, either. Oh, how fickle love is when you're a teen!
He actually asked me out two or three years later when he'd left school.
I'm not the greatest when it comes to keeping up with people in world. I can be distant and very introverted, hiding away on my platform or my farm (maybe I'll explain that one day, but for now I'm just going to drop that there) and doing my own thing. I tend to stick to a very small circle of friends who have proven over time that they are reliable and personable and I think that's the case with a lot of SL users now.
However, I'm also of the belief that if you make a commitment to someone, or a cause, or event, you should 100% follow through with that commitment, or vocalize the fact that you no longer want to be a part of that, yet sometimes it seems that communication can be an issue for people, and that is what starts to become frustrating.
In terms of blogging, there have been a couple of instances where if I hadn't spoken up, I would have lost some amazingly creative "sponsors" (I kinda hate that term and I'm noting this down to speak about at another date too), and there's also been at least one notable moment where I have 'lost' sponsorship over a misunderstanding, and upon attempting to find out more information have come up against a brick wall.
I suppose it's important to learn when it's a good time to back away, to rethink, rebrand and reboot part of your life, be that SL or RL and though it is always nice to receive a reason as to why someone has 'let you go' or moved on, it's not a pre-requisite, and sometimes you will not get the response you hope for.
Other times, you'll get just enough to learn from and improve on, and it'll give you the boost you need to grow, so I guess it all evens out in the end. ♥
All of the things, Santi :
Body, Hands & Feet : [SIGNATURE] Gianni - Mesh Body
I've been thinking today about how lovely compliments are.
I don't mean those generic "Nice Ass!" compliments, although it's nice to get told you have a good butt!
I mean, when you've worked really really hard at getting something better, and you yourself see an improvement, it's nice to have some sort of outside reinforcement that you're making headway.
Today, I am going to give everyone a compliment when they talk to me, until I run out of spoons. I am going to make sure it is genuine and deserved. I am going to attempt to spread a little positivity, and hope that I can make someone smile and who knows, maybe make their day a little brighter. I think in the process of this, I might also have a greater appreciation for those people in my life.
